Mood: hug me
Topic: "Sticker Shock"
"The existing and long-standing use of the word 'evolution' in our state's textbooks has not adversely affected Georgians' belief in the omnipotence of God as creator of the Universe. There can be no incompatibility between Christian faith and proven facts concerning geology, biology, and astronomy. There is no need to teach that stars can fall out of the sky and land on a flat earth in order to defend religious faith. . ."--James E. Carter, January 2005.
The State Superintendent of Schools, Republican Kathy Cox, was ordered to remove from all High School Biology textbooks a "sticker" which noted that "evolution" was a theory and that it should be considered consistent with other theories. This "sticker" is, of course, consistent with the ordered opinion of the current President of the United States, George "Wiliiam Jennings Bryan" Bushman.
Frodo was struck by the Bushman's reference to "Intelligent Design," subsequent to the Georgia ruling. Frodo smelled another attempt to paint "activist judges" as incompatible with the reasoned opinions of God-fearing American citizens. Frodo decided therefore to conduct a survey in order to determine whether former President Carter's opinion, or that of the Bushman actually mirrored public opinion in The Shire. Note dear reader that the survey was based on the responses of 100% of those to whom questions were addressed.
100% of the male feline contingent of the Shire felt that the Bushman proved himself to be an alcoholic, a junkie, a coward, and a moron, but not necessarily in that order.
100% of the female canine contingent of the Shire felt that the Bushman was entirely consistent in his behavior, noting that he has never told the truth about anything.
100% of the male avian contingent of the Shire expressed the opinion that the Bushman never did learn how to fly, to talk, or otherwise perform on his own.
100% of the male canine contingent expressed the belief that the Bushman served a purpose as a substitute fireplug.
100% of the Hobbits in the Shire are convinced that the Bushman is living proof that evolution is not without flaws.