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" Citizen Soldiers" (5)
" Putin' Out" (5)
" Thin Ice"(9)
""I Ain't Got Much" (5)
""Soft Memories" (7)
"$100, Are You Sure?" (5)
"0 Preservative Added"(2)
"105 Minute Workday"(9)
"16 Percent Factor"(3)
"176,000,000 to 1"(8)
"26 Damn Dollars"(6)
"3 Percent Turnout" (2)
"37 Come 11" (5)
"3:10 to Yuma" (7)
"50 Weeks of Reality TV"
"501 (c)(4)"
"54 Pounds" (8)
"8.8 Pounds"(6)
"A Capitol Idea" (6)
"A Code in My Node"
"A Course is a Course"(2)
"A Day At The Beach" (3)
"A Dog Named Bo" (5)
"A Hobbit of an Idea"
"A Man's Army"
"A Patriot Act" (7)
"A Patriotic Act"
"A Perfect World"
"A soldier booed?'(7)
"A Space Odyssey" (4)
"A Taxing Story" (5)
"A Thousand Campfires"(4)
"A Three Hour Tour"(8)
"A Touch of Class"(5)
"A Waisted Day" (5)
"A Woman Scorned"
"Aagh,I'll Pay,I'll Pay"
"Abe Wong, of Gondor"(5)
"Act I, Scene I" (8)
"Act I, Scene II" (8)
"Act I, Scene III" (8)
"Adjustable 2nd Card"(3)
"Adjusting Policies"
"Adjusting the Clock"(8)
"Aegean Adventure" (2)
"Ah ah ah Stayin' Alive"
"Airline Highway" (5)
"Alan Scott" (7)
"All Aboard"
"All Bets Are In" (2)
"All Charged Up"
"All Good Things" (4)
"Allah Be Praised" (5)
"Almost Heaven" (2)
"Alpha Dog"(7)
"Alright, Who Did It?"(7)
"Also Sprach Frodo" (4)
"Always Wear Gloves" (3)
"AM Radio Next?"
"America's Toilet" (6)
"American Cemetery"(8)
"An Admission"
"An Apple A Day" (7)
"An Hour A Day" (6)
"An Ugly American"(4)
"Anchorman" (6)
"And the Winner Is" (2)
"Andy Griffith Redux"
"Another Single Woman?"
"Another Three-namer"(5)
"Another Time/Place"(4)
"Anvil Throwin' Time"(8)
"Apocalypse Now?" (3)
"Aragorn" (4)
"Armored Dildos" (3)
"As Far As We Know" (2)
"Ask Ann Landers" (3)
"Assembly LineDancing"(4)
"Astronaughty" (2)
"Atlanta Times Three"
"Augmentation" (2)
"Augustus Agonistes" (5)
"Aurora Borealis" (8)
"Autumnal Observances"(2)
"Avast You Lubbers"(6)
"Baby Doctors (2)"
"Baby Fiona"(7)
"Baby Nathan Yahoo"(10)
"Back Door Basra (2)"
"Back inthe Saddle Again"
"Bad Boys, Bad Boys"
"Bad Time for Bonzo" (3)
"Balance of Nature" (3)
"Balance of Payments"(5)
"Balancing the Budget"
"Ballamer" (4)
"Bang the Drum Slowly"
"Bank Prank" (5)
"Baptists are Pussies"(7)
"Barbed Wire Escape (2)"
"Barbie Banditos" (3)
"Barely Bearble"(7)
"Barely Defensible" (2)
"Barry Me Not (2)"
"Bathroom onna Right"(3)
"Beach Music" (7)
"Because It Is Hard" (4)
"Beechwood 4-5789"(6)
"Belling the Cat" (2)
"Ben McGee" (3)
"Benny and the Jets"(5)
"Berlusconi in Love"(6)
"Best be straight Boy"(5)
"Best Day/Worst Day"(6)
"Best in the South" (5)
"Best in the World?"(5)
"Betray Us" (3)
"Bettah than Etta"(4)
"Better Man" (3)
"Better Than Pong"
"Big Time Sports" (3)
"Big Words,LittleMind"(6)
"Bilbo's Birthday (2)"
"Bilbo's Little Boy"(5)
"Bilbo's Revenge" (5)
"Bill and Hillary (2)"
"Billy World" (2)
"Bimini Babes" (3)
"Bird is the Word" (3)
"Birmingham Jail" (5)
"Birthday Baggins"
"Birthday Buddies" (7)
"Birthday Memory" (4)
"Birthin' No Babies" (3)
"Bishop to King's Castle"
"Black Friday" (2)
"Black Gold, Texas Tea"
"Black Hole Blues" (4)
"Black Jack"
"Black Russians" (6)
"Black Widow" (3)
"Blackboard Jungle"
"Blame Game" (3)
"Bleached Bones" (5)
"Blitzkrieg Bellini" (2)
"Blood and Swash" (3)
"Bloopers" (5)
"Blue Christmas" (2)
"Bo's Birthday"(5)
"Bob Sikes' Cut"(9)
"Bob, Bob, Bobbit" (3)
"Bobby, not Ben"(6)
"Bon Air Bellicose" (4)
"Bon Giorno" (6)
"Bona Lisa" (5)
"Bonds-v-Skvara" (3)
"Boo Boo Poo Poo"(9)
"Boromir & Galadriel"(5)
"Bottled in Thyme"(7)
"Bottom Ten"(9)
"Bovine Stem Cells?"
"Boy, I Say Boy"
"Boycott BP"
"Breaker, Breaker" (4)
"Breakin' rules" (7)
"Breaking News" (7)
"Brer Fox (2)"
"Bridge at Andau"(11)
"Bring Back Ross" (2)
"Bring the Bowl"
"Broken News"(10)
"Brother of the Ring"
"Brownback Mountain"
"Brownie Hawkeye"
"Buckwheat Breathes" (2)
"Bumper Sticker"
"Burn Baby, Burn" (3)
"Bush in the Bullrushes"
"Bush Baby, Bush (2)"
"Bush is Chinese?" (2)
"Bush Press Conference"
"Bush-Bashers Be We (2)"
"Busman's Holiday(2)"
"Butt...Butt...Butt" (3)
"Butterflies? Sheesh!"
"Buttermilk Drops" (3)
"Buy a Subaru" (11)
"Buy Stock in America"(6)
"Cabin Fever" (5)
"Cain Not Able" (7)
"Cake in the Rain"
"Cake in the Rain"(3)
"Call Me Ishmael" (3)
"Callista, an Albino?"(7)
"Camp Pleasant" (2)
"Can She Name Them?(2)"
"Can You Hear Me Now?"
"Canaan Conspiracy"(6)
"Candygram" (4)
"Captive Audience"(6)
"Caramel or Carmel?"(3)
"Carolina Cougar(2)"
"Carolina Curmudgeon" (5)
"Cartoon Characters" (3)
"Case of Packy Stann"(3)
"Cash crash crashed?"(5)
"Cat Fight" (5)
"Caterpillar Quandry" (3)
"Causal Relationships"(9)
"Cause It's One, (2)"
"Ceramic s"
"Ch-ch-changin'" (4)
"Change a'comin" (5)
"Change is Good" (5)
"Change?" (3)
"Changin' Channels" (2)
"Chapter 13"
"Chariots of Fire"
"Chariots' a' Comin'"(4)
"Chassahowitzka" (2)
"Chauncey Gardner"(7)
"Chemical Alley" (6)
"Cheney of Fools" (2)
"Cherem" (3)
"Chew my Gazebo, Willya?"
"Chief Noc-a-Homa" (3)
"Chingachgook Lives"
"Chipmonkeys Alert (2)"
"Chipper" (6)
"Christian Balls"(10)
"Christian the Lion"(4)
"Christian Valuelessness"
"Christmas Communique"(3)
"Christmas, 1936" (2)
"Chutzpah Hooters" (4)
"Cilled a Bar?" (3)
"Cindy, oh Cindy"(4)
"Citizen Soldiers" (2)
"Clark and Lois (2)"
"Classified Ads are Cool"
"Claymore Gregg" (3)
"Clean Machine" (2)
"Clean up in Aisle 4!"(4)
"Climb It Chains" (8)
"Clinton Cuts" (7)
"Clone Chipper,Please"(4)
"Cockatiel Lounge" (2)
"College of the Shire"(6)
"Combat Kelly (2)"
"Come On Baby"(8)
"Come on Down" (3)
"Comin' Clean" (5)
"Comin' Home" (3)
"Commencement (2)"
"Comparables" (6)
"Condi for President" (3)
"Cone of Silence" (4)
"Conflagration" (3)
"Confusion Reigns"(10)
"Congress Goes to War (2)
"Congress' Schmidthead"
"Conspiracy Theory" (4)
"Copy Cat Chinese" (5)
"Country Roads" (7)
"Crawford Convention" (2)
"Crikey" (2)
"Crime and Punishment(2)"
"Crotch Rocket Delite"(4)
"Cult of the Wild"(7)
"Curious, George?"
"Currahee" (5)
"Da Juice Is Back" (3)
"Dad" (5)
"Damages Done (2)"
"Damn Close" (4)
"Damn It To Hell" (5)
"Damn Lies" (7)
"Dandy Dale" (7)
"Danger Will Robinson"(5)
"Danger,Will Robinson"(8)
"Darth Dick" (5)
"Darwin's Company" (4)
"Das Boot"
"Das Ende" (6)
"Date With David" (2)
"Day of Infamy" (4)
"Day-O, Me Wan Go"(7)
"De Tar-Ball Baby" (6)
"Dead Honkey"
"Dearest Bilbo"
"Debits on the Left?" (2)
"Decisions, Decisions"(6)
"Deep and Dark" (5)
"Deep Shiite" (3)
"Degree of Separation"(6)
"Deja 1958 Over Again"
"Deja Who?"(7)
"Delano" (4)
"Diazinon Ditties (2)"
"Dick Clark Top 10(2)"
"Dimmer Switch" (6)
"Dirty Copter" (4)
"Do They Like Kool Aid?"
"Doctor, Mr. MD"(9)
"Dodged a Bullet"(7)
"Dogmobile" (3)
"Dogs Rule"
"Doing the Right Thing"
"Don't Cut My DSL" (5)
"Don't Feed the Animals"
"Dont Touch That Dial"(6)
"Doofus" (9)
"Doohan's Delight" (3)
"Doris Miller" (6)
"Dorothy Rose" (4)
"Double Deal" (6)
"Doubting Thomases" (3)
"Doug Williams"(4)
"Dover" (4)
"Down Below Back Home"(4)
"Downtown Cardinals"(9)
"Dr. Phil" (5)
"Dubai-Bye" (3)
"Dueling Banjos" (3)
"Dumb and Dumber" (3)
"Dumb As We Wanna Be"(3)
"Dumber Than Dirt" (3)
"Dumbest Politico (2)"
"Eager Uighurs" (4)
"Early Admission" (8)
"Eight Nine Four" (4)
"Elect Jeff Jackson"(10)
"Elizabeth I" (5)
"Emily Latella Lives"
"Emperor's Clothes" (2)
"End of the Line"
"Ending Sams Patience"(7)
"Engine Uprisin'" (4)
"Ensign Pulver"(5)
"EOTUS" (5)
"Equinox Approaching"(10)
"Equinoxious" (4)
"Escalator Escalatin'"(5)
"ESP" (6)
"Etchings, Anyone?"(5)
"Ethel Merman Lives"
"Eve, It's Oil!"
"Evenin' Govnah" (6)
"Everyday Miracles"
"Evil Thoughts" (3)
"Eye Opener" (3)
"Eyes of a Gorilla"
"Fair is Fare"(7)
"Falcon" (8)
"Fall Ball" (3)
"Fallin' Behind"(11)
"Falling Apart" (9)
"Fargo Felines" (5)
"Fashionable Frodo" (5)
"Father Ed" (3)
"Faux les Bas" (2)
"Female Insurgency (2)"
"Ferengi or Ferangi?" (3)
"Fergit? Hell No!"
"Film at 11"
"Findin' William"(11)"
"Firing US Attorneys" (3)
"First Freeze" (6)
"First Learn to Lose"
"First National Bank" (5)
"First Sentence" (8)
"Five Easy Pieces" (4)
"Float Yer Boat" (4)
"Flower Power (2)"
"Foe Years Old" (4)
"Follow the Money"
"Followin' Ava" (4)
"For More Years" (3)
"Forbidden Fruit"
"Fords and Dads" (2)
"Foreclosure Follies" (7)
"Foreclosure Notice" (6)
"Forest Primeval"(8)
"Form 666" (3)
"Forms For Everything"(6)
"Foundling Fathers"(7)
"Fourteen Years Ago?"(5)
"Fox Views" (3)
"Frack You" (7)
"Frances Died Today"(7)
"Fred's Dead Head" (3)
"Free at Last"
"Free Hidden Telecast"(4)
"Freedom? Hell No" (3)
"Friend by Your Side" (3)
"Friend by your Side" (4)
"Friendly Persuasion" (5)
"Friends of Bill" (7)
"Frist Friends"
"Frodo and Housman" (2)
"Frodo and Jesus"
"Frodo and Revere?"(7)
"Frodo And Truckers (2)"
"Frodo Dissents" (6)
"Frodo Not Foggo (2)"
"Frodo of Arabia(2)"
"Frodo Op" (5)
"Frodo Regrets"
"Frodo Study Group" (2)
"Frodo visits Bilbo"
"Frodo's Almanac"(9)
"Frodo's Bad Day"
"Frodo's Book Club"(5)
"Frodo's Dilemma" (3)
"Frodo's Faux Pas" (3)
"Frodo's Final Four" (3)
"Frodo's Foreign Policy"
"Frodo's Hall of Fame"(4)
"Frodo's Newer Friend"(6)
"Frodo's Retirement"(8)
"Frodo's Revenge"
"Frodo's Revenge"(7)
"Frodo's Solutions" (6)
"Frodo's Xmas Story"(6)
"Frodo, James Frodo" (3)
"Furriners" (4)
"Gainful Employment" (3)
"Galadriel Is No More"(3)
"Gandalf's Challenge (2)"
"Garland Duesenberry" (2)
"Gas Guzzler A-Go-Go"
"Gasp, Wheeze (2)"
"Gay Faux Holes" (5)
"Genarlow de Chariot" (3)
"Genesis Ignored" (3)
"Geneva Accords Redux"
"Geography Lesson" (3)
"George to the Rescue"(3)
"Georgia on my Mind"(3)
"Getting Your Wish" (3)
"Gidget Goes Gondor"(7)
"Gimme Head With Hair"(3)
"Girls Night Out" (6)
"Give 'em Hell, Tom" (5)
"Give Heath a Chance (2)"
"Give Us Your Tired. . ."
"Giving Way to Anger" (2)
"Glenn Frey"(11)
"Glory Days"
"Goin' Home" (3)
"Gondor Goodfellas"(9)
"Gondor Gravitas" (3)
"Good Cop" (7)
"Good Day America" (6)
"Good Friday It Was"(9)
"Good Friday, Maybe"(11)
"Good Ol Mountain Dew"(5)
"Good Son"
"Goodbye Kids (2)"
"Goodbye, Ethan" (2)
"Goodman is Hard to Find"
"Goose Again"
"GOP Convention" (3)
"Gotta Have a Home (2)"
"Grading on a Curve"
"Graffiti Government" (2)
"Great American Hero"
"Great American Hero" (2)
"Greatest Duet Ever"(6)
"Greed is Good"(5)
"Greetings" (8)
"Grissom not Gruesome"(4)
"Groupies for Edwards"(4)
"Guess We Forgot?"(8)
"Guest Workers (2)"
"Guns of August" (7)
"Guts of August" (3)
"Gwinnett Again?" (3)
"Halo, 1,2,3?" (3)
"Ham I Am" (3)
"Handi-Wipes" (3)
"Hang 'em High" (2)
"Hanky Time, Ladies"
"Happens in Threes"(5)
"Happy Anniversary"(9)
"Happy Mardi Gras"(2)
"Harpo Speaks"
"Harry" (2)
"Harry's Bar-Venice" (2)
"Hawkeye, Redux"(7)
"Haz Mat" (3)
"He Ate the Olive!"(7)
"He is deeply missed (2)"
"He Picks Up Poop?" (5)
"He Took De Bait" (8)
"He's 'Little Ricky'?"(7)
"Healthcare for Frodo"(5)
"Heart Soar Like Hawk"(5)
"Heck of an Engineer"(7)
"Hedge Fund Hippies" (3)
"Heeeerrre's Frodo" (3)
"Heeere's Johnny" (6)
"Heeerrrre's Frodo" (3)
"Hello, Mr. Wilson" (5)
"Hello? Central?" (3)
"Help Wanted"
"Helping Frodo" (4)
"Here Come da Judge" (2)
"Here Come da Judge" (6)
"Here Kitty-Kitty" (4)
"Here Kitty-kitty"(5)
"Here's Help, Now Leave"
"Here's Your Watch" (3)
"Hi Jinx" (5)
"Hide Anythin' Edible"(5)
"High Chair" (2)
"Hobbits And a Truck"(4)
"Hold On Romo" (2)
"Hold the Malaise" (4)
"Honey Dew List"(9)
"Hopalong Frodo"(9)
"Horn of Africa (2)"
"Horse Latitudes" (6)
"Horsehockey" (3)
"Hosea Can You See" (3)
"Hosea Can You See?" (3)
"Hot Tamale" (3)
"Hotel Plimhimmon"(9)
"HOV or DOA?" (3)
"How Dogs Love Us" (10)
"How Many Delegates?"
"How Many Delegates?" (3)
"How Now Broun Cow"(8)
"Hraka" (4)
"Huckleberry Hound" (3)
"Hund Scheisse CSI" (5)
"Hungarian Answer" (4)
"I Believe in Music (2)"
"I can hope, can't I?"(9)
"I Could Cry" (2)
"I Inspired You?"
"I say it's Spinach. . ."
"I'll Get Back to You"(3)
"I'll Huff and Puff" (4)
"I'll Take a Vowel"
"I'm Baaack" (2)
"I'mSo In LoveWithYou"(7)
"Ides of March Again" (4)
"Ides of Texas" (6)
"IED's in Congress" (2)
"If Frodo Ran The DHS"(5)
"If It Ain't OneThing"(5)
"If the truth be told"(6)
"If You Remember,Then"(6)
"If" (6)
"Imagine,General Newt"(6)
"Imitation of Life" (5)
"Immigration Reform (2)"
"In a Galaxy Far Away(2)"
"In a Pig's Eye" (4)
"In Dog We Trust" (10)
"In the Beginning"
"In the Beginning" (3)
"Incomparable Moron" (4)
"Indoor Toilets Rule" (4)
"Intersex Village" (2)
"Interstate Parking (2)"
"Ion Propulsion"(7)
"Iran's Tom Hayden"
"Irish Spring"(3)
"Is it in the Water?"
"Is That in America?" (2)
"Is You da One,Jimmy?"(3)
"Islamic Fundamentals"(8)
"Isn't Amnesty Good?"(3)
"Isn't Change Good?"(6)
"It's A Trap" (6)
"It's Just a Movie"
"It's Just Business"
"Ja, Wir Konnen."
"Jack Crabb" (10)
"Jambo Jumbo" (3)
"Japanese Movie?" (3)
"Je suis Frodo"(10)
"Jefferson Rock" (3)
"Jes' the facts Ma'am"(4)
"Jim Crow" (5)
"Joad Family Reunion?"(6)
"Joad Jobs" (4)
"Joe Soptic" (8)
"Jonestown Redux" (3)
"Jose and Claudia" (4)
"Joshua Generation" (3)
"Just Another Day" (3)
"Just Clearin' Brush"(3)
"Just Desserts (2)"
"Just Desserts" (7)
"Just Say 'Nyet'"(7)
"Just to CU Smile" (5)
"Kandy Kakes 2"
"Ken Meets Jack"
"Key Word Apology" (6)
"Killer's Geraldine" (4)
"Kilowatts Per Mile" (6)
"Kiribati Republic"(6)
"Kirk Saves Nemo"
"Kiss a Girl Goodbye"(2)
"Knew You Not Pompey?"(3)
"Kodak Moment" (2)
"Kool Sailboat" (4)
"Korea, Korea" (2)
"Kudlow's Kreeps"(4)
"Lady of Rohan" (3)
"Land Ho"(8)
"Lean and Hungry " (2)
"Leeward, I Say, Leeward"
"Legs Diamond" (3)
"Legs" (3)
"Leslie" (4)
"Lessons Learned" (2)
"Let Them Eat Cake"
"Let's Bake Cookies" (3)
"Let's Play A Game" (6)
"Letter Home" (6)
"Letter to Lou" (4)
"Liberal Lament" (40)
"Lief, Leaf, or Loaf"(8)
"Life In A Red State"
"Lights of Chicago"
"Like a Barack" (2)
"Limbaugh Hero"(7)
"Lime Bandits" (3)
"Lime is on my side" (6)
"Limestone Cowboys" (3)
"Lip Smackin' Good?"(6)
"Little Big Horn (2)"
"Little Houdini" (5)
"Little Sky"
"Littlest Angel" (2)
"Livin' is Easy?"(7)
"Loans and Deposits" (4)
"Lois, I Never Lie"(8)
"Lonely Avenue" (3)
"Lonesome Frodo" (3)
"Look away Dixieland"(6)
"Look for da Union Label"
"Look Who's Talkin'" (2)
"Lookin' Back, Texas" (3)
"Lost Weekend"(8)
"Low Water, Slow Flow"(3)
"Lox? Or Locks?" (7)
"Lunatic Cattle Call"(8)
"M-G-M Material"
"Ma Bell is Baaack" (3)
"Ma Bell Lives" (7)
"Macaca, Your Macaca" (2)
"Mad Dogs&Englishmen"(6)
"Made You Look" (6)
"Magic Fridge (2)"
"Magic Moments"(7)
"Make Jobs, Not War"(7)
"MaMa's Little Babies"(3)
"Man For All Seasons" (2)
"Man of the Century"
"Man Up, Harry"(6)
"Man's Best Friend?"
"Many happy returns"
"March Forth" (8)
"Marking Time" (3)
"Martyr Magic" (2)
"Marvelous Mac"(8)
"Mary Lee & Genie"(8)
"Master of None" (8)
"May Day, Comrade"(7)
"Maynard G. Krebs" (7)
"Medal of Honor" (6)
"Media is the Message(2)"
"Media Reporting" (6)
"Mental Healthcare" (4)
"Michelle, my Belle"(7)
"Mick's Day"(8)
"Mickey and Me"(6)
"MidSummer Nights Dream"(7)
"Mikileaks" (6)
"Missionary Position" (3)
"Missionary Position" (7)
"Mississipp' Sippin'"(2)
"Mister Roberts" (8)
"Moamar:The Movie"(7)
"Mohair Sam" (5)
"Mon Petit Shoe"(4)
"Monkeys in Mississippi"
"Moody Blue"(7)
"Moody" (7)
"Mooman" (3)
"Moon Over Miami"(4)
"Mooosic" (5)
"Moovin' On Up" (2)
"Mordor or Antarctica?"
"More Than Some" (4)
"Moultrie Poultry" (3)
"Mount Mulch" (2)
"Movin' On Up" (2)
"Mr. Toad's Motorcar (2)"
"Mumbai, My Lord" (4)
"Murtha For President(2)"
"N. Leroy" (7)
"Name That Tune"(4)
"Nascaroil" (4)
"Nat King Cole Sucks"(5)
"NCAA---Blech!" (7)
"Nein, nein, nein"(7)
"Never Doubt Bilbo"
"Never heard of him"
"New Life, Old Leaves"(4)
"Newest Friend"(8)
"Newman's Own" (4)
"Newt/Mitt '12" (3)
"Next Case" (6)
"Next Door Neighbors" (3)
"NFL Commissioner (2)"
"NFL Trade" (3)
"Nielsen Ratings" (2)
"Nine Months PG" (7)
"Nixon Agonistes" (3)
"No Faux News?" (3)
"No Googling Allowed"(4)
"No Humor Today"
"No Peanut Left Behind"
"No Sale" (3)
"No, Not Russian" (4)
"No-No, No" (3)
"Nobody Even Asked"(8)
"Noo Yawk Stateamind"(2)
"Not a Bang,a Whimper"(7)
"Not Funny, Dr Jones"(5)
"Not North Carolina" (6)
"Not Percy Sledge?" (3)
"Not Percy Sledge?"(3)
"Number One" (3)
"Number Please?"(7)
"Number, Please"(8)
"Numbers Don't Lie" (3)
"Numbers Racket" (4)
"Obama Doctrine" (5)
"Obama's Generals"(5)
"October Dreamin'" (4)
"Ode to an Athlete (2)"
"Ogal Preston Crews (2)"
"Oh Kenny Boy (2)"
"Oh the possibilities"(8)
"Oh Ye White Whale" (3)
"Oh, Sadaharu" (2)
"OK Baptist Chorale" (4)
"Old McDonnell's Farm"(7)
"Old Time Baseball"(9)
"Old Times Topic" (6)
"Olympic Changes" (4)
"On Her Code?" (4)
"On Vacation, I'm Sure"
"One Act Play"
"One Down, More Comin'"
"One For the Good Guys"
"One More Round" (4)
"One Orbit of the Sun"(2)
"Only 434 More to Go" (2)
"Opportunity Sox" (3)
"Or the Yellow Peril?"(6)
"Osama Can You See?" (2)
"Our God Is Better" (3)
"Our Town" (5)
"Our Town" (8)
"Out Damned Spot (2)"
"Out of Kilter" (5)
"Out of the Ashes" (4)
"Overdue Books" (3)
"Pace Car" (3)
"Painted Toenails?"(4)
"Panic Attack"(10)
"Pants on Fire"
"Parade of Horribles"(4)
"Part Two" (5)
"Pass the Malais" (4)
"Passion Flowers" (5)
"Past is Prologue" (3)
"Pat bin Laden"
"Patsy for America"
"Peaceful Easy Feelin"(3)
"Peacetakescourage" (3)
"Permanent Vacation" (5)
"Persons of the Year"
"Philadelphia Bunnyface?"
"Philosopher Kings" (4)
"Pickled Cabbage?"
"Picture of Frodo"(5)
"Pilot Wales" (2)
"Pirate Booty"
"Pit Bull Revenge"(4)
"Pius Baloney I" (7)
"Place of Good Abode" (3)
"Plaque 42W, Line 12"
"Play It Again, Sam"
"Play Melancholy Baby"
"Play the Frodo Game"(6)
"Playin' Possum" (3)
"Poland Parole Patrol"(5)
"Polish or Polish?"
"Poll Results Just In"
"Poly Sci 101"(9)
"Poor People"
"Pope for a Day" (10)
"Pope-a-Dope" (5)
"Popeil Veg-o-matic"
"Potty Training" (3)
"Power Surge"(9)
"Pray for, Gas?" (4)
"Pray With Me Henry" (2)
"Pre-emptive Passages"(2)
"Preemptive Invasion"
"Presidential Erection"
"Problem, Officer?" (3)
"Problem, Officer?" (5)
"Problems?" (4)
"Promises Made" (3)
"Promises To Keep" (5)
"Promises to Keep"(9)
"Proud I Am"
"Proud Walter" (5)
"Proxy Server Error" (4)
"Prudent" (10)
"Psychiatrist,5 cents"(6)
"Pugnacious Maverick"
"Pulitzer Means Squat"(8)
"Punxatawney Bush"
"Puppy Angel" (2)
"Purple Pill Please" (2)
"Putin Tang" (3)
"Qaddafi Wins, For Now"(7)
"Qualified? Yeah Right!"
"Quayle Hunting"
"Queen of Memphis"
"Queen of the Damned"
"Quittin' Time" (8)
"Quoth the Raven"(7)
"QVC and Dorothy"
"Qwest For Truth (2)"
"Radio and TV"(7)
"Rain, Rain, Go Away?"(4)
"Rainy Day in Georgia(2)"
"Raptor Rapture" (7)
"Read All About It" (5)
"Real Men Don't Shop"(4)
"Rechargin' da Shire"(11)
"Recycled Air (Gasp)" (2)
"Red Sky at Morning" (3)
"Red Sky at Morning"(5)
"Reduced Flow Flush"(5)
"Reimers' Rhymers"(5)
"Remember These?"
"Remembering Jessica" (2)
"Remote Outpost" (7)
"Render Unto Wright" (4)
"Reverend LeRoy" (3)
"Rice on Hot Tin Roof(2)"
"Rick Santa Anna"(5)
"Right Not Privilege" (4)
"Road to Damascus"
"Road Trip" (5)
"Roads Scholar" (8)
"Rocket Man"
"Rocket Man" (5)
"Rockets Red Glare" (5)
"Rocks Rox"(8)
"Roger the Dodger"(4)
"Roger Williams Sucks"(2)
"Rooty-Toot" (6)
"Rose Garden Promises"(4)
"Royal Portrait" (2)
"Rubber Ducky" (2)
"Rubio's Cube"(6)
"Rules" (6)
"Rules" (7)
"Rumblin' Bumblin'" (3)
"Rumsfeldstiltskin" (2)
"Run Eddie, Run" (5)
"Run Far, Run Fast"(7)
"Run Forrest, Run"
"Run, old hare!"
"Runaround Tsu"
"Runs in the Family" (3)
"Rwanda Go Home?"(6)
"S'long Sarong (2)"
"Sabato Knows" (2)
"Sam Shopping" (2)
"San Juan de Capistrano"
"Sandy Hook" (8)
"Santos v. Vinnick"
"Satire-Apology to Mick"
"Sauron Psalms" (2)
"Sauron's Scythe" (4)
"Savin' Gas" (4)
"SAWB" (3)
"Say Cheese"(7)
"Say It Ain't So,Jo"(4)
"Say It Ain't So,Joe" (2)
"School Holiday" (4)
"Science Marches On"
"Scooter" (2)
"Scott Free" (4)
"Sears and Loveaduck" (5)
"Second Line (2)"
"Second of Two" (4)
"Seems Like Yesterday"(4)
"Seems Like Yesterday"(9)
"Seen Any Blue Swans?"(3)
"Selective Service"(8)
"September Twelfth"(5)
"Serendipity Strikes" (3)
"Serge is Working?" (3)
"Serious,For A Change"(6)
"Seven Samurai" (5)
"Sex or Gender?"
"Sexiest Man Alive"(5)
"Shaken, not stirred"(10)
"She is No Ma Kettle"
"Sheep and Museums"
"Sheep in Mindanao?"
"Shenandoah Rangers"(7)
"Shenandoah" (6)
"Shire Sunset"
"Shock and Awe" (4)
"Shoot 'em, Vern"
"Side by Side" (7)
"Sidin' With Anemone"(4)
"Silence of the Lambs"(2)
"Silent, but deadly"(6)
"Sing It Again" (4)
"Sink or Swim"
"Sir A Gut" (3)
"Six Days on the Road"
"Skull and Bones"(4)
"Skunk Cabbage" (3)
"Sleepy Time (2)"
"Slippin' and a Slidin'"
"Sludge Stimulus" (5)
"Small Businesses-Ha!"(6)
"Small Gray Planet"(2)
"Small Victories"
"Smellin' Roses"
"Smirk Jerk" (2)
"Smokin' Pesticide Dope"
"Smoochy Time" (4)
"Snazis" (2)
"Snow Tan"(11)
"Snowiches" (6)
"So Who's Sluggo?" (2)
"Social Security Reform"
"Social Security" (7)
"Socrates and Friends"(5)
"Soldier of the King"
"Soldier of the Storm(2)"
"Solitary Isolation" (3)
"Solving a Problem"(9)
"Somethin' Borrowed"(5)
"Something in Commons"(5)
"Sometimes Life Sucks"(4)
"Sorcerer's Apprentice"
"Soul Train" (5)
"Souter Rules, Dude"
"Southern Ladies" (5)
"Sow's Ear from Silk"(5)
"Space Poop" (3)
"Speechifyin'" (4)
"Speedy Gonzales" (3)
"Spelling, -23" (6)
"Sperm Count" (3)
"Spiro T. Palin" (4)
"Spoonerized" (6)
"Spring Equal Knox" (3)
"St. George" (4)
"Stan & Ollie"(7)
"State Dinner" (3)
"States' Rahts" (3)
"Sticker Shock"
"Stolen Bases" (3)
"Stragedy" (2)
"Stragedy" (8)
"Strangerthan fiction"(6)
"Strip Searched" (9)
"Stupidly" (5)
"Stupor Bowl Sunday"(2)
"Subsidizing Seeds"(6)
"Sunday, Sunday"(9)
"Sunni Daze" (4)
"Supportin' da Troops"(2)
"Supportin' da Troops"(3)
"Survey Says" (6)
"Sweet Georgia Brown"
"Swiss Miss" (5)
"Take a letter, dearie"
"Take It Off Baby" (5)
"Takes a Worried Man"(4)
"Talibanme Banana"(8)
"Talkin' Turkey" (3)
"Tax Driver" (9)
"Taxpayer Assistance (2)"
"Tea Olive" (7)
"Tear Down That Wall"(4)
"Teflon Causes Cancer"
"Ten Cent Coke" (3)
"Tennessee Stinks" (6)
"Term Paper" (5)
"Terminal? Great!"
"Terre Bonne" (6)
"Terrible Swift Sword"(6)
"Terrible Two's" (2)
"Tess of D'Uberville"(8)
"Tess of the Dorghis" (8)
"Texas Exes" (8)
"Thank the Academy"(4)
"Thank You Rand Paul"
"Thank You, Molly" (2)
"Thanks, Dad" (3)
"Thar She Blows"
"That Looks Like Me"(5)
"That's the way it is"(5)
"Thawt Yuze a Toad"(7)
"The 60 Year Struggle"(5)
"The Atlanta Eye" (6)
"The Blue Dog"(11)
"The Boston Massacre"(9)
"The Boys of '63" (8)
"The Brotherhood Begins"
"The Eyes of Texas"
"The Forum" (2)
"The Future is Now (2)"
"The Garden of Good"
"The Good Book" (4)
"The Good Doctor"(6)
"The Great Quixote" (9)
"The Grumpy Dwarf"(9)
"The Important Stuff"
"The Italian Stallion"
"The Litany" (6)
"The Longest Day" (5)
"The Non-Issue" (3)
"The Perfect Storm" (2)
"The Pre-Fellowship"(4)
"The Prophecy"
"The Real Rhett" (4)
"The Second Amendment"
"The Silver Sow Award"(3)
"The Splurge" (4)
"The Turtle" (3)
"The Union Label"(6)
"There is a Virginia" (2)
"They're He-ear" (4)
"Thin Ice, Frodo" (4)
"Third Strike Nuance (2)"
"This Day in History"(3)
"This, Too, Shall Pass"
"Three A.M." (4)
"Three Siblings" (4)
"Three Votes Short" (3)
"Thriller" (9)
"Thunder Road"
"Thy Name be Peace" (2)
"Tie a Yellow Ribbon" (3)
"Tiger By The Tail" (5)
"Time to Cut Brush" (3)
"Time With Friends" (3)
"Times A' Wastin'" (3)
"Title IX Disaster" (5)
"To Arms, To Arms"
"To the Hoop (2)"
"Together Again" (3)
"Tokyo Rush" (5)
"Tom Bombadil isDying"(7)
"Tom Bombadil Returns"(9)
"Tom" (4)
"Top Two Percent" (7)
"Tora Bora Lora. . ." (2)
"Torah, Torah..."(6)
"Toro, Andalay,Toro (2)"
"Touchdown Swabbie" (3)
"Tovarich" (4)
"Tra La,Spring,Tra La"(6)
"Train Wreck"(8)
"Transparency" (4)
"Travel Sucks" (4)
"Tree Fishin' (2)"
"Trees v. Forest"(9)
"Trekking Mount Doom" (2)
"Tripod Hackers?"(9)
"Trouble Sleepin'" (3)
"Truckin' for Isaiah" (3)
"Truly,Totally, Nuts"(3)
"Tuesdays with Nancy"(4)
"Tullahoma Tequila (2)"
"Tumbler" (3)
"Turkey Day Walkabout"(2)
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"Tweety Pie" (2)
"Twenty to Life" (5)
"Twismas Tunes" (5)
"Twisted Sister" (4)
"Two Americas" (4)
"Two Americas" (9)
"Two Steps Back" (4)
"Two Thousand, Ate" (4)
"Unademdaze" (4)
"Unborn in the USA" (6)
"Unbroken Circle" (7)
"Unconditional Surrender"
"Unconventional, you say?"(7)
"Underdog Shmunderdog"(4)
"Unmarked Grave" (6)
"Untimely Events"
"UR Number Is Up" (7)
"Vacation Brouhaha" (3)
"Vacation Comin'" (2)
"Vandals at the Gates"(2)
"Vat of Chocolate"(6)
"Vero Possumus" (4)
"Veto Shmetoe (2)"
"Vick Drops, Cough!" (3)
"Video Thriller"(5)
"Vinson Can Gogh"(6)
"Virgin Birth" (2)
"Virginia is 4 Lovers"(4)
"Virginia Lovers" (4)
"Vom Winde Verweht" (2)
"Vote for Steve" (2)
"Vote Frodo (Not)"(7)
"W is for Wuss""
"Wait 'til Next Year" (2)
"Wait 'Til Next Year"(2)A
"Walkin' in the Woods"(5)
"Walkin' the Dogs"(8)
"Walkin' the Walk"
"Wall of Libertad"
"War on Middle Class"(2)
"War on Tara"
"Warm Bucket of Spit"(4)
"Was Miers His Attorney?"
"Watch Mr. Wizard" (3)
"Water Into Wine" (11)
"Water into Wine?"
"Watts da plan, Man?"(5)
"Wayne Johnson"(4)
"We Make a Better Day"(5)
"We Sank a Truck"
"We Will Rock You"
"Weather Channel Follies"
"Weddin' Down South" (3)
"Wedding Bell Blues"
"Weeds Way Is Up?"(5)
"Weepy Seepy Peepee"(3)
"Welcome Home, Soldier"
"Well, Duh!"
"Well, Poop"(8)
"West Wing Redux" (2)
"What Goes Around" (6)
"What if JR Shot Back"(9)
"What is a Shimkus?" (2)
"What Mark Felt"
"What Schedule?" (2)
"What Time Is It (2)"
"What We Have Here (2)"
"What Would Mitt Do?"(3)
"What's A Cubit?"
"What's a Sgarbi?" (5)
"What, Me Worry?"
"What, Me Worry?" (3)
"Where Sun Doan Shine"(8)
"Where's Frodo?" (5)
"Where's my puppy?"(4)
"Where's the Beef?"
"Where's the Fire?"(5)
"Whither Frodo?"
"Whitman's Sampler"(6)
"Who Dat Say Who Dat?"
"Who dat?" (2)
"Who did it?" (2)
"Who Torted?"
"Who Was That Guy?" (5)
"Who's In Line?"(6)
"Who's We, White Boy?"(3)
"Why are you here"?(3)
"Why are you here?" (3)
"Why Black Folks Cheered"
"Wiccan I do for you?"(2)
"Wicked Pickett"
"Wide Stance" (4)
"Will better be?"(7)
"Willard" (7)
"Willie B had heart" (5)
"Winchester Women (2)"
"Wink at the Moon"
"Winter Solstice"
"Wishin' and Hopin'"
"Wither Channels" (5)
"Wither Weather"(9)
"Wither Weather?"(4)
"WMD in the Shire"(6)
"Words To Live By"(7)
"Workin' on Night Moves"
"Worst Candidate Ever"(8)
"Worth Waiting For?"(5)
"Write a Letter" (7)
"Writer's Block" (2)
"Wrong Again, Frodo"(3)
"Wyomin' Gloamin'" (2)
"Xmas in Shreveport"(6)
"Yahoo" (4)
"Yankee Humor" (5)
"Yankee Ingenuity"
"Yella Rose a Taxes"(4)
"Yellow Peril" (3)
"Yes, No, Who Knows?" (2)
"You Betcha" (6)
"You Put Your Eye Out"(2)
"You Snake in the Grass"
"You Take the High Road"
"Zimmerman Noted"(6)
"Zinni in Bloom (2)"
"Zounds, Sounds!" (5)
"Zounds, you varlet"(4)
Southern Pine Beetles"(4)
The H Word" (6)
Citizens of Middle Earth
The Fellowship of the Ring
The Return of the King
Frodo, Keeper of the Ring
Friday, January 14, 2011
Some Guys Have All The Luck
Mood:  chillin'
Topic: "Captive Audience"(6)

71% of the land surface of the United States of America was covered by snow this past Wednesday.  All comments about "global warming" and "Al Gore" aside, true it is that nearly the entire nation found itself transfixed, by the magic that is television.  For some, they watched because there was nothing else to do.  For others, it isn't easy to explain.  It had happened before, most notably in Dallas, followed thereafter by New York.  It was as if we just needed to get together and have a good cry.

It did not take long to realize that something very important was happening.  Frodo noted the presidential reference to "Congress on the corner" as an update to "government of the people, and by the people, and for the people" as an indication of something truly significant in mind.  Minutes later, Frodo sensed the tone of an unwillingness to merely accept the sacrifice of the honored dead.  He caught the cachet of a refusal to place blame on each other, and a stated desire for discussion over disputation.  But was this merely Frodo's Lincolnesque bias at play, having heard only what he had hoped to hear?

There were tears in Sam's eyes, too.  They talked about who was there, and who was not.  They replayed the moments of greatest impact, and they listened as the first reviews came in from the land of talking heads.  It was then that Frodo turned to Sam and said "I know you're going to think I'm crazy, but I think we just heard a modernization of Lincoln's Gettysburg Address.  The War is not over, but amid the horror, we have to prepare for the peace that is to come.  We must build that peace in honor of those who brought us to this point, at this time."

Sam listened, but was silent.

Tom Brokaw was there, on the screen.  "Did you hear what he said?", said Frodo.  "Tom Brokaw just said the same thing.  He said that the President had patterned a 21st centrury rendition of the Gettysburg Address."

Frodo was full of himself.  Tom Brokaw shared his thoughtful analysis and his impression of words spoken to a captive audience, most of whom were proud, and glad, that they had watched and listened, even though the words had not been written on the back of an envelope aboard a locomotive-driven train. 

May the words, "Gabby opened her eyes," last just as long.  They mean just as much.


Posted by loveysdaddyga at 8:13 PM EST
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Wednesday, January 12, 2011
You Didn't Have To Be So Nice
Mood:  cool
Topic: "Snowiches" (6)

"Mr. Frodo, do you know why you'll never starve to death in the desert?," asked the sub-teen known to Frodo as "Beckham."  Frodo pondered for a few seconds and surrendered to the future star of Manchester United or the Tottenham Hotspurs.  "Because you can always eat the sandwiches there (sand which is there)."

Frodo thought of this "shellacking" by his neighbor in the Shire as he examined the structure of the frozen precipitation now declared as part  of the "Weather of Northern Aggression" which has a stranglehold on all things good and southern.  There is, at bottom, a frozen concoction which resembles a slice of ice cream cake.  In the middle there is the fluffy whipped cream-like feature, topped by a thin layer of semi-solid ice.  Examined in hand, it does appear more than edible.  Frodo took a slice to his young friend, and asked him if he had ever eaten a 'Snowich"?  Sensing treachery, he ran from Frodo with due haste and the snowball-like projectile fell harmlessly to his rear.

The Shire is at an absolute standstill, and not since the historic winter of '93 (which allows Frodo's reference thereto make him feel as if he were Gabby Hayes or some other super senior), has non-expressway transportation become an absent envy to Hobbits and Elves alike.  Only the Riders of Rohan are able to adjust.

Frodo has learned a great deal about Cedar Waxwings in the past several days.  Masked and traveling together in great swarms, they descend on berry-producing fauna of all kinds, and totally denude the plant of berries in a frenzy that would put the white shark to shame.  Hollies, mahonia, photinia, and previously unidentified vines all lose their fat-rich produce to these colorful and excitable winter visitors to the Shire.  Worrying about the resultant absence of food, Frodo has donated almost half a loaf of cornbread to the land beneath the bird feeders, in hopes that the visitors will find a healthy reason to stay a bit longer.

What does result however, is a truce.  Squirrels and countless other avian visitors stand side-by-shoulder as they feast on the cornbread and the seeds which fall from the feeders.  Frodo cannot turn the pages in his bird book fast enough to identify even a significant minority of the variety available.  The exceptions being Fiona, and Mick, the Wonder Dog, who have taken note of the locations where cornbread crumbs can be consumed with impunity.  Unwatched, they force their way into the throng, and begin to absorb great amounts of cornbread with a snort, and a smile.  The snowiches form on their noses, and they retreat only when decibels are increased by the Hobbit.

The temperatures are brutal, and the darkness of the mini-forest about the Shire is a reminder of the threat to creatures of all shapes and sizes.  It is serious business, and a moment taken to enjoy a few snowiches makes faraway places and hideous crimes seem remote.     

Posted by loveysdaddyga at 4:16 PM EST
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Sunday, January 9, 2011
A Little Bit of Soap Will Wash Away My Tears
Mood:  sad
Topic: "Degree of Separation"(6)

In that magical season of 1980, the Philadelphia Phillies (then Frodo's favorite team), ended the frustrations of multiple generations by finally winning a World Series.  Frodo danced and sang when Pete Rose caught the pop-foul that fell out of Bob Boone's glove into his own.  His heart raced with the long strides of Garry Maddox in center-field, who patrolled all of the earth not covered in water.  He dried his palms on his official Phillies t-shirt while Steve Carlton dueled with mere mortals at the plate, and Mike Schmidt drew blood from the sweat of pitchers stupid enough to pitch to the best hitter of the time.  Not forgotten was the wisdom and the brilliance of Dallas Green, manager of the miracle, on this, his finest of days.

It seems quixotic to now refer to the very worst of days, that which is yet known as "9/11," as Frodo apparently switches topics, and notes the birth on that day of a little girl amidst the suffering and the loss which mark our lives.  Tragedy apparently, like triumph, is sometimes registered in someone's idea of heaven by the convergence of joy and sadness.  How awful, thinks Frodo, when he hears a distraught father note that it was his daughter, born that terrible day, who passed from our world in a hail of gunfire in a shopping center in Tucson, Arizona just a few short hours ago.

The circle, yet unbroken, is completed when Frodo discovers that the little girl was the grand-daughter of Dallas Green.

Somehow, winning a couple of baseball games will never seen quite so important to either Dallas Green, or to Frodo.   

Posted by loveysdaddyga at 11:44 AM EST
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Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Don't You Feel Like Cryin'
Mood:  not sure
Topic: "ESP" (6)

Make no mistake about it, Frodo thought Ronald Reagan was a senile snake.  He admits however, to being rather amazed as he watched an old friend actually weep for joy as Ronald Raygun took the oath of office.  EDITORIAL NOTE:  Frodo's theme this eve stems from the weeping willow from Ohio who was today sworn in as the newest Speaker of the House.  Frodo learned on that day to sometimes soften his words when transitions occur.  It is better to let a useless politician hang himself than for Frodo to waste his resources supplying the fool with a rope.  Truer it is that there are some whose disagreements with Frodo are sincere, and to them Frodo owes a few moments of silent observation.

So far, Frodo has seen nothing which in any impacts his preconceived notion that we have another group of naive miscreants drinking the booze poured by oil company lobbyists.  To that end, Frodo will retain his silence until somebody steps into a big old pile of dog-doo.

Frodo will wager on Darryl Issa, representing the home turf of the unlamented Richard Outhouse Nixon.  Perhaps Representative Issa has already done so, and Frodo just ain't heard the news.   


Posted by loveysdaddyga at 10:01 PM EST
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Tuesday, December 28, 2010
One Less Egg To Fry
Mood:  cheeky
Topic: "Xmas in Shreveport"(6)

Last evening, the Ramblin' Wreck of Georgia Tech confronted the Academy d' Air Force in the Independence Bowl.  Frodo was struck, first of all, by the fact that he hadn't seen so many white guys on a football team since Ronald Reagan played George Gipp.  Having visited Shreveport, Louisiana, on several occasions, Frodo was quite concerned about how all the players from Atlanta's Technical School would be greeted by the local residents, who seem to believe that Ronald Reagan is still alive.

Frodo learned last week that four of the student-athletes from Georgia Tech were dropped from the roster due to failing grades in class.  As if that were not ominous enough, three more players were held out of play during the first half for a curfew violation two days before the game.

A curfew violation!  In Shreveport?  What time, asked Frodo, was curfew, 7:30PM?  For there is, by Frodo's reckoning, nothing to do, especially if you happen to be black, like the Georgia Tech players, in Shreveport.  By all that is truly fair, the players should have gotten recognition for their creativity.

Just before the game was to start, the "special operations" guys from the Air Force Academy paraded to mid-field in order to demonstrate the winged effectiveness of the school mascot, an honest-to-goodness falcon.  One of the Special Ops guys removed the hood from the head of the falcon, and released the leather thong from around his foot and launched him into his air-borne routine.  Frodo happened to be paying attention, and noted that, rather than return to his handler, the bird flew part way around the football stadium and disappeared over the far wall.  The handlers did everything, by the book, in trying to get their escapee to return, but he was no longer visible to man or camera.  That sucker was long gone.

What, Frodo asks, would you do if somebody dragged you to Shreveport in December and told you it was your reward for being a good boy?  According to press reports, the falcon struck up an acquaintance with a number of pigeons in downtown Shreveport.  Given the time of year, he obviously had something on his mind other than lunch.

Frodo intends to follow susequent events in Shreveport over the next couple of months.  Come Spring, there are liable to be some mighty fast pigeons diving from high altitudes in search of another set of turkeys from Atlanta.

Air Force Academy 14, Georgia Tech 7. 

Posted by loveysdaddyga at 5:43 PM EST
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Sunday, December 26, 2010
Beware The Devil Woman, She's Gonna Get You
Mood:  on fire
Topic: "Big Words,LittleMind"(6)

What follows is an actual entry in the Opinion Section (once known as "Letters to the Editor") of the ATLANTA JOURNAL-CONSTITUTION of December 26, 2010.  Frodo's response follows thereafter.

"At last, a column by Cynthia Tucker that is not filled with her spewing hatred of the GOP; ranting about racism, and/or protecting illegal immigrants. . .As a rule (in her liberal opinion), the Republican Party, tea party, and conservatives can do nothing right, and for many of us, her diatribes get really old.  Why does she use such big words that most of us need to look up in Webster's to even know what they mean?  Cynthia, who are you trying to impress?  I for one would much rather you write columns the caliber of this piece--without the show-off words, and your usual vitriol (one of your words, not mine)."--Sheryl Danner, Norcross 

Yeah Cynthia, somebody might get the idea that Georgians aren't willing to accept second-best after all, if you keep using big words that Sheryl (from Gwinnett County, no less) can't understand.  After all, a national statewide educational ranking that has not risen above 49th in over a decade (including the District of Columbia) should require that you "dumb down" to the level of your readers.  Frodo would like to personally suggest a few alternatives to help you properly address readers like Sheryl.  Frodo is sure that some of his friends will be glad to help.

How about cretin?  Well, that does assume mental illness, so probably not totally appropriate.  Moron?  That does assume a potential mental age between eight and twelve, and the possibility of routine work under adult supervision, so it is better, but still not perfect.  How about dimwit?  Webster would define that as one who is mentally slow or stupid, so that's pretty close, don't you think?  It might also impress Sheryl, since you are definitely trying to impress somebody, that you turned to Webster, in order to look up big words.  As he thinks about it, Frodo has come up with an even better suggestion for classifying Sheryl; why don't we just address her as a Neanderthal?

Sheryl, try page 564 of the Seventh New Collegiate, column two. 


Posted by loveysdaddyga at 7:53 PM EST
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Wednesday, December 22, 2010
There's More To Come And Carry Us Away
Mood:  special
Topic: "Good Day America" (6)

Today the exhibition season ended.  Spring training is entirely behind us, because, and maybe for the first time in more years than any of us care to admit, we have a President of the United States.

Maybe it takes two years for any man (or woman) to absorb and adjust to the responsibility of the job.  Obviously, there are some who may be just as lost eight years later as the day they first mispronounced "nuclear."  The meld between vision and action is not the result of a Klingon physical ceremony, rather it comes, over time, most often quite painfully.  Thus we have seen the maturation of Barack Obama, the President of the United States.

Funny it is, thinks Frodo, that tonight the conversational references to John McCain, Sarah Palin, Mitch McConnell, or others of that ilk do nothing more than further trivialize their importance.  We have a Presient who can act with dignity and honor to his commitments, and to his demonstrated desire to bring our people together.

Most of all, fellow Americans, no one doubts that we have got a President.

Let the games begin.

Posted by loveysdaddyga at 8:06 PM EST
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Monday, December 20, 2010
If You Go It Would Kill Me
Mood:  suave
Topic: "Letter Home" (6)

My Dearest Scarlett;

   My, my, how time does fly.  It seems like only yesterday when all those would-be suitors gathered at Twelve Oaks, never to know that Ashley Wilkes, a gift you could not have, was your desire.  Many of those would fall amongst the 620,000 lost in the insanity which began 150 years ago this very evening.  Oh my dear, how you lost yourself in the swirling romance of men in uniform, and talk of glory, glory, glory.

   I grieve still over the loss of our dear Bonnie, and your noble father, John O'Hara.  If the number of those lost was told in modern terms, more than 6 million souls were surrendered to the folly of arms against the Union.  The fact that it began in my native Charleston is too much for even me to consider, knowing the foolishness of men who fought for a way of lfe that had already gone windward.

   Perhaps, in times to come, men will no longer strive to enslave some in order to obtain greater wealth, but I have my doubts.  For as surely as there are young men whose eyes are blinded by the rush of arms, young women will stand and cheer as they go marching off to war.  Except for you Scarlett, for we both know that it is your precious Ashley for whom you wait, while the blessed Melanie suffers an undeserved fate.  Aye, poetry it is, the treachery of those who mourn by day, while the bier passes their way, for it is in their guile that time doth pass, until we are no more among things that last.

   My ship waits in the harbor, so I must go, if not to win a war, at least to prolong it.  Such is the role I play, and you, my dear, are the only winner amongst us all.


   Captain Butler, CSA    

Posted by loveysdaddyga at 8:43 PM EST
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Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Their Finest Gifts They Bring
Mood:  special
Topic: "Frodo's Xmas Story"(6)

Frodo remembers, once in a while, something from his past which has rooted itself into what he now knows as his persona.  He remembers hearing a "Bible story" about a bunch of church officials meeting Jesus outside the Temple, near where the "offering box" was located.  Together they watched as the supplicants offered their gifts as they entered.  Most of them, as the story went, were well-dressed and obviously pretty well-off, since their gifts were very generous.  That is with the exception of one lady, who had no fine garments, and whose offering consisted of but a few coins which were apparently all that she had.

Jesus turned to the church officials and told them to take note of the fact that the lady had given more than any of the others who entered therein.  He told them that she had given all that she had, and that such a sacrifice was far greater than the large amounts tendered by those with more to give.

This coming Saturday, Frodo and the Men of Gondor will gather again before the Mammon of modern retail, with their small red kettle and the bells of the Salvation Army.  The volunteers will receive a new and very special gift this year which is a direct segue from the story-line above. 

Proximity allowed Frodo and Sam some years ago to drive near Mordor in order to visit with and to meet the one now known as Merry, the proud.  The visit between internet correspondents fulfilled all the good wishes of new friends.  Learned was much about the parties thereto, and the things that were important, one-to-another.  Merry seemed most interested in the good acts of the Men of Gondor, and particularly in the ringing of the bells aside the small red kettle.  Frodo doubts not that among the years that followed, Merry would drop coins into a red kettle and tell the volunteer that the submission was "for Frodo," thereby startling and confusing good-hearted people who knew not of what she spoke.

This year, Frodo has received a check for $50 from his fellow warrior in the Fellowship.  The request being that Frodo deposit it in the little red kettle for her so that she could share in the joy of the gift with her friend.

Social Security Disability payments offer barely enough to meet the challenges of daily need.  The fact that anyone, solely dependent on such, can scrimp and save enough, over an entire year, in order to accumulate enough for such a gift is as amazing as it is awesome.

Frodo has turned to the Men of Gondor with this story, and reiterated the parable of she who has given beyond all others.  Together, as volunteers working on behalf of the Salvation Army, we offer the heartfelt "Thank You" and "Merry Christmas" to she known as Merry, of the Fellowship.

Dale Hajost      Roger Green      George Gfroerer      G. Craig Baker

Rod Pope         Abe Wong          Phil Brooks              Eric Lawrence

Joe Kyle           George Hornbein  

Posted by loveysdaddyga at 8:44 PM EST
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Tuesday, December 14, 2010
The Tide Is High But I'm Holding On
Mood:  vegas lucky
Topic: "A Capitol Idea" (6)

Two forces are converging in the skies above our homeland at the very same time, thinks Frodo.  Government is responding to the will of those who bothered to vote during the off-year elections, and Business is developing new ways to increase profits.  Frodo has been smitten by one example from the private sector, and is today prepared to submit his own plan for the economic recovery of Middle Earth.  Let us begin with what is happening, right now.

The Just Born Candy Company of Bethlehem, Pennsylvania, whose products include Peanut Chews, Peeps, Mike and Ike's, Teenie Beanie, and Hot Tamales, devised a plan to incentivize, both positively and negatively, their sales staff.  Management told the two dozen sales people that, if they met their cumulative sales goals for the fiscal year just ended, they would each receive a vacation in Hawaii.  On the other hand, they said, much to the bemusement of the sales staff, should the cumulative sales goals not be met, the sales staff would receive a vacation in the tundra of the Arctic.

Ha, ha, ho, ho, they thought.

The sales staff exceeded prior year accomplishments by 2%, unfortunately the goal was to exceed the prior year by 4%.

Goodbye Maui, Hello Fargo.

The 19-story Radisson Inn, the tallest building in Fargo, is tonight the vacation home of the the 24-person sales staff of the Just Born Candy Company of Bethlehem, Pennsylvania.  Last evening, they attended the All-U-Can Eat Spaghetti Dinner held every Monday Night, at the VFW.  Today, they attempted to tour two local wineries, but their progress was hindered by the 2 and one-half feet of snow on the ground.  The temperature on Maui is currently 78 degrees.

Management announced to the sales staff this evening that next year's choices would be Maui, if they met the new goals, or, in the other event, in Rapid City, South Dakota.

Who says management isn't responsive to the needs of working people?

Frodo began this treatise talking about two forces at work, so he offers the potential, dear reader, to something similar to the newly-elected House of Representatives of the United States.  Should you guys and gals succeed at reducing the deficit, bringing an end to the War in Afghanistan, and returning our nation to full employment, then each of you will get to go to Hawaii in order to search for the birth certificate of President Obama.  On the other hand however, should you fail to reduce the deficit by even just a smidgen, or to reduce troop levels in our latest unnecessary foreign entanglement, or to put everybody that wants a job in a job, then you guys and gals, every last damn one of ya, gets two weeks in Wasilla (second prize is a full month), next December.

You had better start hoping this global-warming stuff is for real.


Posted by loveysdaddyga at 9:43 PM EST
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