Topic: "So Who's Sluggo?" (2)
Frodo has been considering the inevitability of politics in America, and how even the noblest always seem to be something else when history fully examines the corpus of the times. John Fitzgerald Kennedy, who energized a nation, and brought a generation to ask what they could do to help, was probably sexually active with a bimbo sponsored by the Mafia. Ronald Reagan, who made it politic to be patriotic, and initiated a revolution in political implementation, most probably violated the law and his Constitutional authority. Universally, politicial leaders of all shapes and sizes have succumbed to the call of pecuniary and glandular interests. This has caused Frodo to wonder about the sudden and marked presence of the feminine gender in positions of power, and what may happen in the days, and weeks, and months, and years to come.
"Yes Mr. Smeagol, what can I do for you?"
"Madame President, I was once a mere Hobbit, now I am here to inform you of a matter of great concern to your loyal supporters in the Shire."
"I see, and what might this entail?"
"Madame President, as you know, your support during the last election included an astounding percentage of registered voters in the Shire, and contributions by working Hobbits to your political campaign were far above the average of all Middle Earth."
"I am aware of the generous support of my constituents in the Shire. Your President is grateful. What is it that you seek, Mr. Smeagol?"
"Madame President, have you ever toured the Godiva Chocolate Factory? One of my business associates is arranging a weekend for certain favored consumers and friends of the company to bathe in the luxury of the finest designer chocolates in the world, and your friends in the Shire would be honored to arrange for you to join us."
"Godiva, you say? Hmmm, one of my favorite products of the Shire. However, I believe we stray from my question?"
"Madame President, I appreciate your focus, and wonder if you wouldn't like to perhaps attend an Armani Fashion Show after the factory tour? Given your exquisite taste, it would be an inspirational opportunity to review the contributions of American business to the growing economic trends in our nation."
"Armani? A Fashion Show??
"Excuse me, Madame President?"
(Enter, stage left, the President's Chief of Staff, Prince William, Son of the Prince of Wales, who has been in attendance, but busily polishing his saber during the conduct of the meeting).
"Madame President, it might be fortuitous to associate yourself with the upcoming product line of this nature. The economic benefit to a loyal constituent, the image of an aggressive and successful effort within a growing economy, and, undoubtedly, the gratitude of a corporate sponsor, all are positives to your re-election campaign," said the young man with the rounded buttocks.
"Madame President, if I may?," added Smeagol.
"We can also arrange for selected gowns and accessories to be made available to you for specific State occasions. . ."
"Oh, trifles to be sure. Tiaras, a few bracelets, a brooch or two, all tastefully garnished in semi-precious stones. Nothing too ornate. Just something to make sure that there is no repeat of the infamous Laura Bush and two other red dresses at the same affair at the White House."
"I remember that, of course. These would be loaners, and I would be under no obligation?"
"But of course, all strictly on the up-and-up, and with absolutely no strings attached. In fact, you will probably never even remember anything about the donors. They will never bring it up. They have enough on their mind with that silly little issue with the IRS."
"Oh, it's nothing. it seems that the IRS had some minor questions about their working relationship with the Godiva people. It's nothing really."
"Do you think we should have Billy look into it for us?"
"I think that might be good business."
"Okay, now what was the issue on your mind?"
"Oh forget about it, you're far too busy for such a trivial matter now, someday I'll simply make you an offer you can't refuse."
(The President exits, stage right, with a box of bon-bons).