Topic: "Sheep and Museums"
Frodo is pleased to announce plans for the opening this coming spring of the $8.3 million "London Academy of Sex and Relationships" adjacent to Piccadilly Circus. The privately funded project has support from sexual health organizations and charities. The sexual "theme park" will be a multimedia attraction whose goal is to teach visitors to become better lovers and to provide information about disease and sexual problems. Developers promise that it will not be a sleazy sex museum.
Frodo is, however, proud to carry the ring while others argue. Frodo will gladly offer his services in order to ensure the success of this noble undertaking. In fact, Frodo has compiled a list of interactive exhibits and demonstrations which could prove to be both educational and (ahem) stimulating.
Frodo could demonstrate the one-handed, sightless, behind-the-back manipulation of clasps, while reclining in the seat of a 1960 Rambler Station Wagon.
Frodo could also suggest a number of tried and true pick-up lines, including such time-honored family favorites as "Hi, I understand you've been waiting for me? My name is Mister Right." When working in tandem with a buddy one of the most productive was "Hi, this is my friend Thad, who, in turn, will introduce me." In truth, that which always worked best was "Gee, it's too bad the Lamborghini is in the shop, you'd love the ride out to the yacht."
Would it surprise you, dear reader, to know that Frodo is a Scorpio? So is Sam.
Best of all Frodo could make himself available in any of the potential segments of the park. You know, "Fantasyland,""Adventureland,""Tomorrowland," and quite probably "Yesterdayland." Oh well, what else is there to do in London? The food sucks.