Topic: "Brownback Mountain"
Hypocrisy is often the charge, and usually incorrectly spelled, when any politician says anything that contradicts his/her public persona. Frodo feels that Senator Sam Brownback (R-Kansas) is today's justifiable target.
Senator Brownback is a conservatives' conservative from a conservative state. He is opposed to everything that costs money, is mildly fattening, or that would cost him financial support from the Christian Coalition. He is in favor of anything that reduces taxes, increases corn subsidies, or that increases his financial support from the Christian Coalition.
Senator Brownback is also up for re-election.
Senator Brownback was interviewed on television the other evening, and as he droned on about why Mr. Alito would make a fine Supreme Court Justice, Frodo drifted off to sleep. Exactly where Frodo's questions began and Chris Matthews' ended is subject to conjecture.
"Senator Brownback, aren't you voting for Mr. Alioto because he opposes a Woman's Right to Choose?"
"Well, that's certainly not the case, since we have no idea how Supreme Court Justice Alito would rule as it relates to that issue."
"I beg your pardon, Sir. You have stated that it is the most significant issue that will again appear before the court, and you have also indicated your support for him."
"Yes, but no one knows how he will rule. He has said that he has no firm opinion that would undermine his judicial decision."
"Senator, that's baloney, you mean to imply that you would support him if he were in any way inclined to rule in favor of abortion rights?"
"No, what I'm saying is that I believe his testimony that he will consider issues free of bias."
"Senator, with all due respect, Alito refused to respond under questioning, in contrast to Justice Roberts, that he saw Roe v. Wade as 'settled law,' thereby literally stating that he considered the issue subject to change."
"Yes, but nobody can foresee exactly how he would rule."
"Senator, do you mean to honestly say to me, and to the viewing public, that you believe that as a Supreme Court Justice, Mr. Alito might rule to uphold Roe v. Wade?", said the breathless interviewer. "I ask you, under what possible set of circumstances would he in any remote shape or fashion so rule?"
"Well, once again, I say that no one can be sure what might happen."
"You're opposed to the reproductive rights of women, you've made that a cornerstone of your political position, you've stated that you would oppose a pro-choice nominee, you've made public your support for Alito, and you don't know how he would rule?"
"As I said, I don't know for sure how he would rule, but I believe he is going to be a great addition to the Supreme Court."
"Have you ever had sex with a male farm animal?"
"What? Why would you ask me such a question?"
"Because you're a pig and they oughtta make a movie about you."