Topic: "Overdue Books" (3)
In the spirit of non-partisan good government, Frodo has written a letter to the General Services Administration suggesting that the George W. Bush Presidential Library be located within the confines of the United States Embassy in Baghdad. Most people know that this edifice, when completed, will be the largest, most expensive, such building in all the world. Would it not be fitting, Frodo argued, that the location of the war of longest duration, and least consequence, in American History should contain a memorial to poor research and historical ignorance? The possibilities for documenting the folly of war merit serious consideration of Frodo's proposal.
The Richard Cheney Memorial Storm Cellar would make future generations forever immune to references of "Dugout Doug" MacArthur of World War II genre. Cheney was assigned to underground duty while the Incomparable Moron flitted from elementary schools to Shreveport on September 11th. Afterwards, Cheney was rarely observed doing anything in, or for, the public.
The Larry Craig Restroom Stalls would have doors that swing both ways. This action would serve as an ever-mindful warning for clandestine raconteurs that it takes more than a wide stance to repel an insurgency.
The Alberto Gonzales Telecommunications Center would symbolize the totality of information gathered in the national defense during times of crisis. By simply pushing a button, any national defense operative could obtain access to any portion of the former Attorney General's testimony before the Congress of the United States, translated into any one of more than 235 languages, and 114 dialects thereof. "I don't recall" is particularly appealing in Hawaiian, at least it is to Frodo.
Then, of course the mind boggles at all the other reminders of this grandifluorous time in world history, there are the books and records themselves, all gathered and maintained in mint condition. Every document that was published for any purpose whatsoever during the simply unforgettable Bush White House years. Yes, dear reader, the absolutely pristine, untouched by human hand, information which could have guided our national goals to new heights is now available to you for only $19.95 plus shipping & handling. If you choose to visit the library itself, you will be able to research any of the non-classified items in the area known as Barney's Reading Room.
Be sure to look for the autographed copy of "My Pet Goat." You're paying for it you know, big time.