Mood: don't ask
Topic: "Not Percy Sledge?"(3)
Michael Bolton won Frodo's admiration when he crooned his way through his own version of "If a Man Loves a Woman," several years ago. Here was a white guy, taking a classic soul song and giving it a personal trademark which was as notable as Whitney Houston taking Dolly Parton's "I Will Always Love You," and making it into something equally good. Michael Bolton is, however, not to be confused with either Josh Bolton or John Bolton. Josh Bolton is an insignificant presence in an insignificant White House. John Bolton is insane.
In a new book, John Bolton has written that Colin Powell is the villain who prevented the Bush White House from "taking out" Iran at the very beginning, thereby doing a disservice to the best interests of the United States. Frodo was absolutely astounded when he read these words. Astounded not that a rational adult would have such an opinion, but that someone whose elevator not only doesn't reach the top floor but has never extended beyond the parking garage, and who is even more bellicose than Dick Cheney, was actually existant in a position of some influence in the Government of the United States of America. Not since G. Gordon Liddy has Frodo actually shuddered that such a screaming nutbag would potentially have actually been alone in a room with a man whose finger sits atop the nuclear button.
We have, dear reader, actually been to the precipice of destruction.
Frodo is making a personal request to anyone owning or maintaining a controlling interest in any radio station anywhere in the world; please hire John Bolton! Give Bolton the same status as Sean Hannity, Rush Limbaugh, Oliver North, Joe Liebermann, or any other right-wing rutabaga generally recognized as the personification of Elmer Gantry, without God. Let him whisper sweet nothings into the ear of every lunatic asylum alumni within your broadcast arena, and pay him whatever he wants. Just get John Bolton away from any position of prominence, authority, or sanity.
Your country depends on you.
If that doesn't register with you, perhaps there is someone out there that could invite John Bolton to go quail hunting with the Vice President? Frodo will buy the beer.