Mood: vegas lucky
Topic: "Spoonerized" (6)
Frodo misses Johnny Carson, very much. Whether it was a marmoset with a loose bladder attached to his coiffure, or an inebriated Dean Martin dumping cigarette ashes into the coffee cup of George Gobel, Johnny could make Frodo laugh out loud. Frodo thought about those moments, laughing out loud, when he watched the latest commercial from E-TRADE on his black-and-white, and found himself wishing that Johnny Carson were there with him, watching.
Surely, dear reader, you've seen or heard the babies discussing the world of high finance, and how much more reliable it can be when one does his own thing. In the latest presentation, there is but one baby, and he is in a time-out style crib. As he explains, it has something to do with riding the family dog as if he were a pony. Not to be deterred, our hero has his laptop in the crib and is making preparations to check his portfolio, when an oversized one enters and removes the laptop. This allows him to then produce an IPAD, or something like that, from his diaper, and to initiate connectivity while he begins to sing the old Negro spiritual, "Nobody knows the trouble I seen. . ."
Frodo laughed out loud, and that's when he thought of Johnny Carson, and remembered just how much he enjoys laughing out loud, and how much he feels like kicking himself in the butt for forgetting something so basic to Hobbit habit.
There once was a guy on the radio. . .pardon Frodo here old-timers, but he is forced to offer a brief explanation to certain, shall we say, younger readers.
A radio is an audio instrument powered by electricity or, in a wireless state, by batteries. It receives transmissions, known in olden times as radio waves, from designated broadcasting locales. Both music and spoken dialogue can be presented. Radios can be found in the automobiles of fat, ill-educated men who seem to prefer daytime dialogue, or in the motorcar of a Hobbit with at least a modicum of rhythm.
Russ Spooner, when Frodo heard him, was a disc jockey in Nashville who used to produce "Spoonerisms" to unsuspecting miscreants who happened to answer a telephone call only to find themselves as victims, unawares. Frodo's favorite was when Spooner called the Parks Department in Nashville, and introduced himself as Harold, from Yazoo City, Mississippi, a truck-driver who had a delivery for the Parthenon in the main City Park. The befuzzled Parks employee said he was unaware of a delivery, and queried Harold as to the load in his semi.
"Pigeons," said Harold.
"Pigeons?" retorted the befuzzled.
"That's raht," said Harold, "I have a semi-load full of 10,000 pigeons to be delivered to the parking lot of the Parthenon twoday. And, I'm runnin' a little late, so if you could just tell me who's goin' to sign for them, then I'll be on my way back to Yazoo City."
Coronary occlusion is the term that best explains what happened to the befuzzled one after several more minutes of discussion that ended only when informed that he had been "Spoonerized."
That may be the reason why you don't hear things like that anymore on them radios we described earlier. If only Johnny Carson were still around. Frodo can hear him now, on the line with Glenn Beck. Perhaps if Frodo said a little prayer?