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" Citizen Soldiers" (5)
" Putin' Out" (5)
" Thin Ice"(9)
""I Ain't Got Much" (5)
""Soft Memories" (7)
"$100, Are You Sure?" (5)
"0 Preservative Added"(2)
"105 Minute Workday"(9)
"16 Percent Factor"(3)
"176,000,000 to 1"(8)
"26 Damn Dollars"(6)
"3 Percent Turnout" (2)
"37 Come 11" (5)
"3:10 to Yuma" (7)
"50 Weeks of Reality TV"
"501 (c)(4)"
"54 Pounds" (8)
"8.8 Pounds"(6)
"A Capitol Idea" (6)
"A Code in My Node"
"A Course is a Course"(2)
"A Day At The Beach" (3)
"A Dog Named Bo" (5)
"A Hobbit of an Idea"
"A Man's Army"
"A Patriot Act" (7)
"A Patriotic Act"
"A Perfect World"
"A soldier booed?'(7)
"A Space Odyssey" (4)
"A Taxing Story" (5)
"A Thousand Campfires"(4)
"A Three Hour Tour"(8)
"A Touch of Class"(5)
"A Waisted Day" (5)
"A Woman Scorned"
"Aagh,I'll Pay,I'll Pay"
"Abe Wong, of Gondor"(5)
"Act I, Scene I" (8)
"Act I, Scene II" (8)
"Act I, Scene III" (8)
"Adjustable 2nd Card"(3)
"Adjusting Policies"
"Adjusting the Clock"(8)
"Aegean Adventure" (2)
"Ah ah ah Stayin' Alive"
"Airline Highway" (5)
"Alan Scott" (7)
"All Aboard"
"All Bets Are In" (2)
"All Charged Up"
"All Good Things" (4)
"Allah Be Praised" (5)
"Almost Heaven" (2)
"Alpha Dog"(7)
"Alright, Who Did It?"(7)
"Also Sprach Frodo" (4)
"Always Wear Gloves" (3)
"AM Radio Next?"
"America's Toilet" (6)
"American Cemetery"(8)
"An Admission"
"An Apple A Day" (7)
"An Hour A Day" (6)
"An Ugly American"(4)
"Anchorman" (6)
"And the Winner Is" (2)
"Andy Griffith Redux"
"Another Single Woman?"
"Another Three-namer"(5)
"Another Time/Place"(4)
"Anvil Throwin' Time"(8)
"Apocalypse Now?" (3)
"Aragorn" (4)
"Armored Dildos" (3)
"As Far As We Know" (2)
"Ask Ann Landers" (3)
"Assembly LineDancing"(4)
"Astronaughty" (2)
"Atlanta Times Three"
"Augmentation" (2)
"Augustus Agonistes" (5)
"Aurora Borealis" (8)
"Autumnal Observances"(2)
"Avast You Lubbers"(6)
"Baby Doctors (2)"
"Baby Fiona"(7)
"Baby Nathan Yahoo"(10)
"Back Door Basra (2)"
"Back inthe Saddle Again"
"Bad Boys, Bad Boys"
"Bad Time for Bonzo" (3)
"Balance of Nature" (3)
"Balance of Payments"(5)
"Balancing the Budget"
"Ballamer" (4)
"Bang the Drum Slowly"
"Bank Prank" (5)
"Baptists are Pussies"(7)
"Barbed Wire Escape (2)"
"Barbie Banditos" (3)
"Barely Bearble"(7)
"Barely Defensible" (2)
"Barry Me Not (2)"
"Bathroom onna Right"(3)
"Beach Music" (7)
"Because It Is Hard" (4)
"Beechwood 4-5789"(6)
"Belling the Cat" (2)
"Ben McGee" (3)
"Benny and the Jets"(5)
"Berlusconi in Love"(6)
"Best be straight Boy"(5)
"Best Day/Worst Day"(6)
"Best in the South" (5)
"Best in the World?"(5)
"Betray Us" (3)
"Bettah than Etta"(4)
"Better Man" (3)
"Better Than Pong"
"Big Time Sports" (3)
"Big Words,LittleMind"(6)
"Bilbo's Birthday (2)"
"Bilbo's Little Boy"(5)
"Bilbo's Revenge" (5)
"Bill and Hillary (2)"
"Billy World" (2)
"Bimini Babes" (3)
"Bird is the Word" (3)
"Birmingham Jail" (5)
"Birthday Baggins"
"Birthday Buddies" (7)
"Birthday Memory" (4)
"Birthin' No Babies" (3)
"Bishop to King's Castle"
"Black Friday" (2)
"Black Gold, Texas Tea"
"Black Hole Blues" (4)
"Black Jack"
"Black Russians" (6)
"Black Widow" (3)
"Blackboard Jungle"
"Blame Game" (3)
"Bleached Bones" (5)
"Blitzkrieg Bellini" (2)
"Blood and Swash" (3)
"Bloopers" (5)
"Blue Christmas" (2)
"Bo's Birthday"(5)
"Bob Sikes' Cut"(9)
"Bob, Bob, Bobbit" (3)
"Bobby, not Ben"(6)
"Bon Air Bellicose" (4)
"Bon Giorno" (6)
"Bona Lisa" (5)
"Bonds-v-Skvara" (3)
"Boo Boo Poo Poo"(9)
"Boromir & Galadriel"(5)
"Bottled in Thyme"(7)
"Bottom Ten"(9)
"Bovine Stem Cells?"
"Boy, I Say Boy"
"Boycott BP"
"Breaker, Breaker" (4)
"Breakin' rules" (7)
"Breaking News" (7)
"Brer Fox (2)"
"Bridge at Andau"(11)
"Bring Back Ross" (2)
"Bring the Bowl"
"Broken News"(10)
"Brother of the Ring"
"Brownback Mountain"
"Brownie Hawkeye"
"Buckwheat Breathes" (2)
"Bumper Sticker"
"Burn Baby, Burn" (3)
"Bush in the Bullrushes"
"Bush Baby, Bush (2)"
"Bush is Chinese?" (2)
"Bush Press Conference"
"Bush-Bashers Be We (2)"
"Busman's Holiday(2)"
"Butt...Butt...Butt" (3)
"Butterflies? Sheesh!"
"Buttermilk Drops" (3)
"Buy a Subaru" (11)
"Buy Stock in America"(6)
"Cabin Fever" (5)
"Cain Not Able" (7)
"Cake in the Rain"
"Cake in the Rain"(3)
"Call Me Ishmael" (3)
"Callista, an Albino?"(7)
"Camp Pleasant" (2)
"Can She Name Them?(2)"
"Can You Hear Me Now?"
"Canaan Conspiracy"(6)
"Candygram" (4)
"Captive Audience"(6)
"Caramel or Carmel?"(3)
"Carolina Cougar(2)"
"Carolina Curmudgeon" (5)
"Cartoon Characters" (3)
"Case of Packy Stann"(3)
"Cash crash crashed?"(5)
"Cat Fight" (5)
"Caterpillar Quandry" (3)
"Causal Relationships"(9)
"Cause It's One, (2)"
"Ceramic s"
"Ch-ch-changin'" (4)
"Change a'comin" (5)
"Change is Good" (5)
"Change?" (3)
"Changin' Channels" (2)
"Chapter 13"
"Chariots of Fire"
"Chariots' a' Comin'"(4)
"Chassahowitzka" (2)
"Chauncey Gardner"(7)
"Chemical Alley" (6)
"Cheney of Fools" (2)
"Cherem" (3)
"Chew my Gazebo, Willya?"
"Chief Noc-a-Homa" (3)
"Chingachgook Lives"
"Chipmonkeys Alert (2)"
"Chipper" (6)
"Christian Balls"(10)
"Christian the Lion"(4)
"Christian Valuelessness"
"Christmas Communique"(3)
"Christmas, 1936" (2)
"Chutzpah Hooters" (4)
"Cilled a Bar?" (3)
"Cindy, oh Cindy"(4)
"Citizen Soldiers" (2)
"Clark and Lois (2)"
"Classified Ads are Cool"
"Claymore Gregg" (3)
"Clean Machine" (2)
"Clean up in Aisle 4!"(4)
"Climb It Chains" (8)
"Clinton Cuts" (7)
"Clone Chipper,Please"(4)
"Cockatiel Lounge" (2)
"College of the Shire"(6)
"Combat Kelly (2)"
"Come On Baby"(8)
"Come on Down" (3)
"Comin' Clean" (5)
"Comin' Home" (3)
"Commencement (2)"
"Comparables" (6)
"Condi for President" (3)
"Cone of Silence" (4)
"Conflagration" (3)
"Confusion Reigns"(10)
"Congress Goes to War (2)
"Congress' Schmidthead"
"Conspiracy Theory" (4)
"Copy Cat Chinese" (5)
"Country Roads" (7)
"Crawford Convention" (2)
"Crikey" (2)
"Crime and Punishment(2)"
"Crotch Rocket Delite"(4)
"Cult of the Wild"(7)
"Curious, George?"
"Currahee" (5)
"Da Juice Is Back" (3)
"Dad" (5)
"Damages Done (2)"
"Damn Close" (4)
"Damn It To Hell" (5)
"Damn Lies" (7)
"Dandy Dale" (7)
"Danger Will Robinson"(5)
"Danger,Will Robinson"(8)
"Darth Dick" (5)
"Darwin's Company" (4)
"Das Boot"
"Das Ende" (6)
"Date With David" (2)
"Day of Infamy" (4)
"Day-O, Me Wan Go"(7)
"De Tar-Ball Baby" (6)
"Dead Honkey"
"Dearest Bilbo"
"Debits on the Left?" (2)
"Decisions, Decisions"(6)
"Deep and Dark" (5)
"Deep Shiite" (3)
"Degree of Separation"(6)
"Deja 1958 Over Again"
"Deja Who?"(7)
"Delano" (4)
"Diazinon Ditties (2)"
"Dick Clark Top 10(2)"
"Dimmer Switch" (6)
"Dirty Copter" (4)
"Do They Like Kool Aid?"
"Doctor, Mr. MD"(9)
"Dodged a Bullet"(7)
"Dogmobile" (3)
"Dogs Rule"
"Doing the Right Thing"
"Don't Cut My DSL" (5)
"Don't Feed the Animals"
"Dont Touch That Dial"(6)
"Doofus" (9)
"Doohan's Delight" (3)
"Doris Miller" (6)
"Dorothy Rose" (4)
"Double Deal" (6)
"Doubting Thomases" (3)
"Doug Williams"(4)
"Dover" (4)
"Down Below Back Home"(4)
"Downtown Cardinals"(9)
"Dr. Phil" (5)
"Dubai-Bye" (3)
"Dueling Banjos" (3)
"Dumb and Dumber" (3)
"Dumb As We Wanna Be"(3)
"Dumber Than Dirt" (3)
"Dumbest Politico (2)"
"Eager Uighurs" (4)
"Early Admission" (8)
"Eight Nine Four" (4)
"Elect Jeff Jackson"(10)
"Elizabeth I" (5)
"Emily Latella Lives"
"Emperor's Clothes" (2)
"End of the Line"
"Ending Sams Patience"(7)
"Engine Uprisin'" (4)
"Ensign Pulver"(5)
"EOTUS" (5)
"Equinox Approaching"(10)
"Equinoxious" (4)
"Escalator Escalatin'"(5)
"ESP" (6)
"Etchings, Anyone?"(5)
"Ethel Merman Lives"
"Eve, It's Oil!"
"Evenin' Govnah" (6)
"Everyday Miracles"
"Evil Thoughts" (3)
"Eye Opener" (3)
"Eyes of a Gorilla"
"Fair is Fare"(7)
"Falcon" (8)
"Fall Ball" (3)
"Fallin' Behind"(11)
"Falling Apart" (9)
"Fargo Felines" (5)
"Fashionable Frodo" (5)
"Father Ed" (3)
"Faux les Bas" (2)
"Female Insurgency (2)"
"Ferengi or Ferangi?" (3)
"Fergit? Hell No!"
"Film at 11"
"Findin' William"(11)"
"Firing US Attorneys" (3)
"First Freeze" (6)
"First Learn to Lose"
"First National Bank" (5)
"First Sentence" (8)
"Five Easy Pieces" (4)
"Float Yer Boat" (4)
"Flower Power (2)"
"Foe Years Old" (4)
"Follow the Money"
"Followin' Ava" (4)
"For More Years" (3)
"Forbidden Fruit"
"Fords and Dads" (2)
"Foreclosure Follies" (7)
"Foreclosure Notice" (6)
"Forest Primeval"(8)
"Form 666" (3)
"Forms For Everything"(6)
"Foundling Fathers"(7)
"Fourteen Years Ago?"(5)
"Fox Views" (3)
"Frack You" (7)
"Frances Died Today"(7)
"Fred's Dead Head" (3)
"Free at Last"
"Free Hidden Telecast"(4)
"Freedom? Hell No" (3)
"Friend by Your Side" (3)
"Friend by your Side" (4)
"Friendly Persuasion" (5)
"Friends of Bill" (7)
"Frist Friends"
"Frodo and Housman" (2)
"Frodo and Jesus"
"Frodo and Revere?"(7)
"Frodo And Truckers (2)"
"Frodo Dissents" (6)
"Frodo Not Foggo (2)"
"Frodo of Arabia(2)"
"Frodo Op" (5)
"Frodo Regrets"
"Frodo Study Group" (2)
"Frodo visits Bilbo"
"Frodo's Almanac"(9)
"Frodo's Bad Day"
"Frodo's Book Club"(5)
"Frodo's Dilemma" (3)
"Frodo's Faux Pas" (3)
"Frodo's Final Four" (3)
"Frodo's Foreign Policy"
"Frodo's Hall of Fame"(4)
"Frodo's Newer Friend"(6)
"Frodo's Retirement"(8)
"Frodo's Revenge"
"Frodo's Revenge"(7)
"Frodo's Solutions" (6)
"Frodo's Xmas Story"(6)
"Frodo, James Frodo" (3)
"Furriners" (4)
"Gainful Employment" (3)
"Galadriel Is No More"(3)
"Gandalf's Challenge (2)"
"Garland Duesenberry" (2)
"Gas Guzzler A-Go-Go"
"Gasp, Wheeze (2)"
"Gay Faux Holes" (5)
"Genarlow de Chariot" (3)
"Genesis Ignored" (3)
"Geneva Accords Redux"
"Geography Lesson" (3)
"George to the Rescue"(3)
"Georgia on my Mind"(3)
"Getting Your Wish" (3)
"Gidget Goes Gondor"(7)
"Gimme Head With Hair"(3)
"Girls Night Out" (6)
"Give 'em Hell, Tom" (5)
"Give Heath a Chance (2)"
"Give Us Your Tired. . ."
"Giving Way to Anger" (2)
"Glenn Frey"(11)
"Glory Days"
"Goin' Home" (3)
"Gondor Goodfellas"(9)
"Gondor Gravitas" (3)
"Good Cop" (7)
"Good Day America" (6)
"Good Friday It Was"(9)
"Good Friday, Maybe"(11)
"Good Ol Mountain Dew"(5)
"Good Son"
"Goodbye Kids (2)"
"Goodbye, Ethan" (2)
"Goodman is Hard to Find"
"Goose Again"
"GOP Convention" (3)
"Gotta Have a Home (2)"
"Grading on a Curve"
"Graffiti Government" (2)
"Great American Hero"
"Great American Hero" (2)
"Greatest Duet Ever"(6)
"Greed is Good"(5)
"Greetings" (8)
"Grissom not Gruesome"(4)
"Groupies for Edwards"(4)
"Guess We Forgot?"(8)
"Guest Workers (2)"
"Guns of August" (7)
"Guts of August" (3)
"Gwinnett Again?" (3)
"Halo, 1,2,3?" (3)
"Ham I Am" (3)
"Handi-Wipes" (3)
"Hang 'em High" (2)
"Hanky Time, Ladies"
"Happens in Threes"(5)
"Happy Anniversary"(9)
"Happy Mardi Gras"(2)
"Harpo Speaks"
"Harry" (2)
"Harry's Bar-Venice" (2)
"Hawkeye, Redux"(7)
"Haz Mat" (3)
"He Ate the Olive!"(7)
"He is deeply missed (2)"
"He Picks Up Poop?" (5)
"He Took De Bait" (8)
"He's 'Little Ricky'?"(7)
"Healthcare for Frodo"(5)
"Heart Soar Like Hawk"(5)
"Heck of an Engineer"(7)
"Hedge Fund Hippies" (3)
"Heeeerrre's Frodo" (3)
"Heeere's Johnny" (6)
"Heeerrrre's Frodo" (3)
"Hello, Mr. Wilson" (5)
"Hello? Central?" (3)
"Help Wanted"
"Helping Frodo" (4)
"Here Come da Judge" (2)
"Here Come da Judge" (6)
"Here Kitty-Kitty" (4)
"Here Kitty-kitty"(5)
"Here's Help, Now Leave"
"Here's Your Watch" (3)
"Hi Jinx" (5)
"Hide Anythin' Edible"(5)
"High Chair" (2)
"Hobbits And a Truck"(4)
"Hold On Romo" (2)
"Hold the Malaise" (4)
"Honey Dew List"(9)
"Hopalong Frodo"(9)
"Horn of Africa (2)"
"Horse Latitudes" (6)
"Horsehockey" (3)
"Hosea Can You See" (3)
"Hosea Can You See?" (3)
"Hot Tamale" (3)
"Hotel Plimhimmon"(9)
"HOV or DOA?" (3)
"How Dogs Love Us" (10)
"How Many Delegates?"
"How Many Delegates?" (3)
"How Now Broun Cow"(8)
"Hraka" (4)
"Huckleberry Hound" (3)
"Hund Scheisse CSI" (5)
"Hungarian Answer" (4)
"I Believe in Music (2)"
"I can hope, can't I?"(9)
"I Could Cry" (2)
"I Inspired You?"
"I say it's Spinach. . ."
"I'll Get Back to You"(3)
"I'll Huff and Puff" (4)
"I'll Take a Vowel"
"I'm Baaack" (2)
"I'mSo In LoveWithYou"(7)
"Ides of March Again" (4)
"Ides of Texas" (6)
"IED's in Congress" (2)
"If Frodo Ran The DHS"(5)
"If It Ain't OneThing"(5)
"If the truth be told"(6)
"If You Remember,Then"(6)
"If" (6)
"Imagine,General Newt"(6)
"Imitation of Life" (5)
"Immigration Reform (2)"
"In a Galaxy Far Away(2)"
"In a Pig's Eye" (4)
"In Dog We Trust" (10)
"In the Beginning"
"In the Beginning" (3)
"Incomparable Moron" (4)
"Indoor Toilets Rule" (4)
"Intersex Village" (2)
"Interstate Parking (2)"
"Ion Propulsion"(7)
"Iran's Tom Hayden"
"Irish Spring"(3)
"Is it in the Water?"
"Is That in America?" (2)
"Is You da One,Jimmy?"(3)
"Islamic Fundamentals"(8)
"Isn't Amnesty Good?"(3)
"Isn't Change Good?"(6)
"It's A Trap" (6)
"It's Just a Movie"
"It's Just Business"
"Ja, Wir Konnen."
"Jack Crabb" (10)
"Jambo Jumbo" (3)
"Japanese Movie?" (3)
"Je suis Frodo"(10)
"Jefferson Rock" (3)
"Jes' the facts Ma'am"(4)
"Jim Crow" (5)
"Joad Family Reunion?"(6)
"Joad Jobs" (4)
"Joe Soptic" (8)
"Jonestown Redux" (3)
"Jose and Claudia" (4)
"Joshua Generation" (3)
"Just Another Day" (3)
"Just Clearin' Brush"(3)
"Just Desserts (2)"
"Just Desserts" (7)
"Just Say 'Nyet'"(7)
"Just to CU Smile" (5)
"Kandy Kakes 2"
"Ken Meets Jack"
"Key Word Apology" (6)
"Killer's Geraldine" (4)
"Kilowatts Per Mile" (6)
"Kiribati Republic"(6)
"Kirk Saves Nemo"
"Kiss a Girl Goodbye"(2)
"Knew You Not Pompey?"(3)
"Kodak Moment" (2)
"Kool Sailboat" (4)
"Korea, Korea" (2)
"Kudlow's Kreeps"(4)
"Lady of Rohan" (3)
"Land Ho"(8)
"Lean and Hungry " (2)
"Leeward, I Say, Leeward"
"Legs Diamond" (3)
"Legs" (3)
"Leslie" (4)
"Lessons Learned" (2)
"Let Them Eat Cake"
"Let's Bake Cookies" (3)
"Let's Play A Game" (6)
"Letter Home" (6)
"Letter to Lou" (4)
"Liberal Lament" (40)
"Lief, Leaf, or Loaf"(8)
"Life In A Red State"
"Lights of Chicago"
"Like a Barack" (2)
"Limbaugh Hero"(7)
"Lime Bandits" (3)
"Lime is on my side" (6)
"Limestone Cowboys" (3)
"Lip Smackin' Good?"(6)
"Little Big Horn (2)"
"Little Houdini" (5)
"Little Sky"
"Littlest Angel" (2)
"Livin' is Easy?"(7)
"Loans and Deposits" (4)
"Lois, I Never Lie"(8)
"Lonely Avenue" (3)
"Lonesome Frodo" (3)
"Look away Dixieland"(6)
"Look for da Union Label"
"Look Who's Talkin'" (2)
"Lookin' Back, Texas" (3)
"Lost Weekend"(8)
"Low Water, Slow Flow"(3)
"Lox? Or Locks?" (7)
"Lunatic Cattle Call"(8)
"M-G-M Material"
"Ma Bell is Baaack" (3)
"Ma Bell Lives" (7)
"Macaca, Your Macaca" (2)
"Mad Dogs&Englishmen"(6)
"Made You Look" (6)
"Magic Fridge (2)"
"Magic Moments"(7)
"Make Jobs, Not War"(7)
"MaMa's Little Babies"(3)
"Man For All Seasons" (2)
"Man of the Century"
"Man Up, Harry"(6)
"Man's Best Friend?"
"Many happy returns"
"March Forth" (8)
"Marking Time" (3)
"Martyr Magic" (2)
"Marvelous Mac"(8)
"Mary Lee & Genie"(8)
"Master of None" (8)
"May Day, Comrade"(7)
"Maynard G. Krebs" (7)
"Medal of Honor" (6)
"Media is the Message(2)"
"Media Reporting" (6)
"Mental Healthcare" (4)
"Michelle, my Belle"(7)
"Mick's Day"(8)
"Mickey and Me"(6)
"MidSummer Nights Dream"(7)
"Mikileaks" (6)
"Missionary Position" (3)
"Missionary Position" (7)
"Mississipp' Sippin'"(2)
"Mister Roberts" (8)
"Moamar:The Movie"(7)
"Mohair Sam" (5)
"Mon Petit Shoe"(4)
"Monkeys in Mississippi"
"Moody Blue"(7)
"Moody" (7)
"Mooman" (3)
"Moon Over Miami"(4)
"Mooosic" (5)
"Moovin' On Up" (2)
"Mordor or Antarctica?"
"More Than Some" (4)
"Moultrie Poultry" (3)
"Mount Mulch" (2)
"Movin' On Up" (2)
"Mr. Toad's Motorcar (2)"
"Mumbai, My Lord" (4)
"Murtha For President(2)"
"N. Leroy" (7)
"Name That Tune"(4)
"Nascaroil" (4)
"Nat King Cole Sucks"(5)
"NCAA---Blech!" (7)
"Nein, nein, nein"(7)
"Never Doubt Bilbo"
"Never heard of him"
"New Life, Old Leaves"(4)
"Newest Friend"(8)
"Newman's Own" (4)
"Newt/Mitt '12" (3)
"Next Case" (6)
"Next Door Neighbors" (3)
"NFL Commissioner (2)"
"NFL Trade" (3)
"Nielsen Ratings" (2)
"Nine Months PG" (7)
"Nixon Agonistes" (3)
"No Faux News?" (3)
"No Googling Allowed"(4)
"No Humor Today"
"No Peanut Left Behind"
"No Sale" (3)
"No, Not Russian" (4)
"No-No, No" (3)
"Nobody Even Asked"(8)
"Noo Yawk Stateamind"(2)
"Not a Bang,a Whimper"(7)
"Not Funny, Dr Jones"(5)
"Not North Carolina" (6)
"Not Percy Sledge?" (3)
"Not Percy Sledge?"(3)
"Number One" (3)
"Number Please?"(7)
"Number, Please"(8)
"Numbers Don't Lie" (3)
"Numbers Racket" (4)
"Obama Doctrine" (5)
"Obama's Generals"(5)
"October Dreamin'" (4)
"Ode to an Athlete (2)"
"Ogal Preston Crews (2)"
"Oh Kenny Boy (2)"
"Oh the possibilities"(8)
"Oh Ye White Whale" (3)
"Oh, Sadaharu" (2)
"OK Baptist Chorale" (4)
"Old McDonnell's Farm"(7)
"Old Time Baseball"(9)
"Old Times Topic" (6)
"Olympic Changes" (4)
"On Her Code?" (4)
"On Vacation, I'm Sure"
"One Act Play"
"One Down, More Comin'"
"One For the Good Guys"
"One More Round" (4)
"One Orbit of the Sun"(2)
"Only 434 More to Go" (2)
"Opportunity Sox" (3)
"Or the Yellow Peril?"(6)
"Osama Can You See?" (2)
"Our God Is Better" (3)
"Our Town" (5)
"Our Town" (8)
"Out Damned Spot (2)"
"Out of Kilter" (5)
"Out of the Ashes" (4)
"Overdue Books" (3)
"Pace Car" (3)
"Painted Toenails?"(4)
"Panic Attack"(10)
"Pants on Fire"
"Parade of Horribles"(4)
"Part Two" (5)
"Pass the Malais" (4)
"Passion Flowers" (5)
"Past is Prologue" (3)
"Pat bin Laden"
"Patsy for America"
"Peaceful Easy Feelin"(3)
"Peacetakescourage" (3)
"Permanent Vacation" (5)
"Persons of the Year"
"Philadelphia Bunnyface?"
"Philosopher Kings" (4)
"Pickled Cabbage?"
"Picture of Frodo"(5)
"Pilot Wales" (2)
"Pirate Booty"
"Pit Bull Revenge"(4)
"Pius Baloney I" (7)
"Place of Good Abode" (3)
"Plaque 42W, Line 12"
"Play It Again, Sam"
"Play Melancholy Baby"
"Play the Frodo Game"(6)
"Playin' Possum" (3)
"Poland Parole Patrol"(5)
"Polish or Polish?"
"Poll Results Just In"
"Poly Sci 101"(9)
"Poor People"
"Pope for a Day" (10)
"Pope-a-Dope" (5)
"Popeil Veg-o-matic"
"Potty Training" (3)
"Power Surge"(9)
"Pray for, Gas?" (4)
"Pray With Me Henry" (2)
"Pre-emptive Passages"(2)
"Preemptive Invasion"
"Presidential Erection"
"Problem, Officer?" (3)
"Problem, Officer?" (5)
"Problems?" (4)
"Promises Made" (3)
"Promises To Keep" (5)
"Promises to Keep"(9)
"Proud I Am"
"Proud Walter" (5)
"Proxy Server Error" (4)
"Prudent" (10)
"Psychiatrist,5 cents"(6)
"Pugnacious Maverick"
"Pulitzer Means Squat"(8)
"Punxatawney Bush"
"Puppy Angel" (2)
"Purple Pill Please" (2)
"Putin Tang" (3)
"Qaddafi Wins, For Now"(7)
"Qualified? Yeah Right!"
"Quayle Hunting"
"Queen of Memphis"
"Queen of the Damned"
"Quittin' Time" (8)
"Quoth the Raven"(7)
"QVC and Dorothy"
"Qwest For Truth (2)"
"Radio and TV"(7)
"Rain, Rain, Go Away?"(4)
"Rainy Day in Georgia(2)"
"Raptor Rapture" (7)
"Read All About It" (5)
"Real Men Don't Shop"(4)
"Rechargin' da Shire"(11)
"Recycled Air (Gasp)" (2)
"Red Sky at Morning" (3)
"Red Sky at Morning"(5)
"Reduced Flow Flush"(5)
"Reimers' Rhymers"(5)
"Remember These?"
"Remembering Jessica" (2)
"Remote Outpost" (7)
"Render Unto Wright" (4)
"Reverend LeRoy" (3)
"Rice on Hot Tin Roof(2)"
"Rick Santa Anna"(5)
"Right Not Privilege" (4)
"Road to Damascus"
"Road Trip" (5)
"Roads Scholar" (8)
"Rocket Man"
"Rocket Man" (5)
"Rockets Red Glare" (5)
"Rocks Rox"(8)
"Roger the Dodger"(4)
"Roger Williams Sucks"(2)
"Rooty-Toot" (6)
"Rose Garden Promises"(4)
"Royal Portrait" (2)
"Rubber Ducky" (2)
"Rubio's Cube"(6)
"Rules" (6)
"Rules" (7)
"Rumblin' Bumblin'" (3)
"Rumsfeldstiltskin" (2)
"Run Eddie, Run" (5)
"Run Far, Run Fast"(7)
"Run Forrest, Run"
"Run, old hare!"
"Runaround Tsu"
"Runs in the Family" (3)
"Rwanda Go Home?"(6)
"S'long Sarong (2)"
"Sabato Knows" (2)
"Sam Shopping" (2)
"San Juan de Capistrano"
"Sandy Hook" (8)
"Santos v. Vinnick"
"Satire-Apology to Mick"
"Sauron Psalms" (2)
"Sauron's Scythe" (4)
"Savin' Gas" (4)
"SAWB" (3)
"Say Cheese"(7)
"Say It Ain't So,Jo"(4)
"Say It Ain't So,Joe" (2)
"School Holiday" (4)
"Science Marches On"
"Scooter" (2)
"Scott Free" (4)
"Sears and Loveaduck" (5)
"Second Line (2)"
"Second of Two" (4)
"Seems Like Yesterday"(4)
"Seems Like Yesterday"(9)
"Seen Any Blue Swans?"(3)
"Selective Service"(8)
"September Twelfth"(5)
"Serendipity Strikes" (3)
"Serge is Working?" (3)
"Serious,For A Change"(6)
"Seven Samurai" (5)
"Sex or Gender?"
"Sexiest Man Alive"(5)
"Shaken, not stirred"(10)
"She is No Ma Kettle"
"Sheep and Museums"
"Sheep in Mindanao?"
"Shenandoah Rangers"(7)
"Shenandoah" (6)
"Shire Sunset"
"Shock and Awe" (4)
"Shoot 'em, Vern"
"Side by Side" (7)
"Sidin' With Anemone"(4)
"Silence of the Lambs"(2)
"Silent, but deadly"(6)
"Sing It Again" (4)
"Sink or Swim"
"Sir A Gut" (3)
"Six Days on the Road"
"Skull and Bones"(4)
"Skunk Cabbage" (3)
"Sleepy Time (2)"
"Slippin' and a Slidin'"
"Sludge Stimulus" (5)
"Small Businesses-Ha!"(6)
"Small Gray Planet"(2)
"Small Victories"
"Smellin' Roses"
"Smirk Jerk" (2)
"Smokin' Pesticide Dope"
"Smoochy Time" (4)
"Snazis" (2)
"Snow Tan"(11)
"Snowiches" (6)
"So Who's Sluggo?" (2)
"Social Security Reform"
"Social Security" (7)
"Socrates and Friends"(5)
"Soldier of the King"
"Soldier of the Storm(2)"
"Solitary Isolation" (3)
"Solving a Problem"(9)
"Somethin' Borrowed"(5)
"Something in Commons"(5)
"Sometimes Life Sucks"(4)
"Sorcerer's Apprentice"
"Soul Train" (5)
"Souter Rules, Dude"
"Southern Ladies" (5)
"Sow's Ear from Silk"(5)
"Space Poop" (3)
"Speechifyin'" (4)
"Speedy Gonzales" (3)
"Spelling, -23" (6)
"Sperm Count" (3)
"Spiro T. Palin" (4)
"Spoonerized" (6)
"Spring Equal Knox" (3)
"St. George" (4)
"Stan & Ollie"(7)
"State Dinner" (3)
"States' Rahts" (3)
"Sticker Shock"
"Stolen Bases" (3)
"Stragedy" (2)
"Stragedy" (8)
"Strangerthan fiction"(6)
"Strip Searched" (9)
"Stupidly" (5)
"Stupor Bowl Sunday"(2)
"Subsidizing Seeds"(6)
"Sunday, Sunday"(9)
"Sunni Daze" (4)
"Supportin' da Troops"(2)
"Supportin' da Troops"(3)
"Survey Says" (6)
"Sweet Georgia Brown"
"Swiss Miss" (5)
"Take a letter, dearie"
"Take It Off Baby" (5)
"Takes a Worried Man"(4)
"Talibanme Banana"(8)
"Talkin' Turkey" (3)
"Tax Driver" (9)
"Taxpayer Assistance (2)"
"Tea Olive" (7)
"Tear Down That Wall"(4)
"Teflon Causes Cancer"
"Ten Cent Coke" (3)
"Tennessee Stinks" (6)
"Term Paper" (5)
"Terminal? Great!"
"Terre Bonne" (6)
"Terrible Swift Sword"(6)
"Terrible Two's" (2)
"Tess of D'Uberville"(8)
"Tess of the Dorghis" (8)
"Texas Exes" (8)
"Thank the Academy"(4)
"Thank You Rand Paul"
"Thank You, Molly" (2)
"Thanks, Dad" (3)
"Thar She Blows"
"That Looks Like Me"(5)
"That's the way it is"(5)
"Thawt Yuze a Toad"(7)
"The 60 Year Struggle"(5)
"The Atlanta Eye" (6)
"The Blue Dog"(11)
"The Boston Massacre"(9)
"The Boys of '63" (8)
"The Brotherhood Begins"
"The Eyes of Texas"
"The Forum" (2)
"The Future is Now (2)"
"The Garden of Good"
"The Good Book" (4)
"The Good Doctor"(6)
"The Great Quixote" (9)
"The Grumpy Dwarf"(9)
"The Important Stuff"
"The Italian Stallion"
"The Litany" (6)
"The Longest Day" (5)
"The Non-Issue" (3)
"The Perfect Storm" (2)
"The Pre-Fellowship"(4)
"The Prophecy"
"The Real Rhett" (4)
"The Second Amendment"
"The Silver Sow Award"(3)
"The Splurge" (4)
"The Turtle" (3)
"The Union Label"(6)
"There is a Virginia" (2)
"They're He-ear" (4)
"Thin Ice, Frodo" (4)
"Third Strike Nuance (2)"
"This Day in History"(3)
"This, Too, Shall Pass"
"Three A.M." (4)
"Three Siblings" (4)
"Three Votes Short" (3)
"Thriller" (9)
"Thunder Road"
"Thy Name be Peace" (2)
"Tie a Yellow Ribbon" (3)
"Tiger By The Tail" (5)
"Time to Cut Brush" (3)
"Time With Friends" (3)
"Times A' Wastin'" (3)
"Title IX Disaster" (5)
"To Arms, To Arms"
"To the Hoop (2)"
"Together Again" (3)
"Tokyo Rush" (5)
"Tom Bombadil isDying"(7)
"Tom Bombadil Returns"(9)
"Tom" (4)
"Top Two Percent" (7)
"Tora Bora Lora. . ." (2)
"Torah, Torah..."(6)
"Toro, Andalay,Toro (2)"
"Touchdown Swabbie" (3)
"Tovarich" (4)
"Tra La,Spring,Tra La"(6)
"Train Wreck"(8)
"Transparency" (4)
"Travel Sucks" (4)
"Tree Fishin' (2)"
"Trees v. Forest"(9)
"Trekking Mount Doom" (2)
"Tripod Hackers?"(9)
"Trouble Sleepin'" (3)
"Truckin' for Isaiah" (3)
"Truly,Totally, Nuts"(3)
"Tuesdays with Nancy"(4)
"Tullahoma Tequila (2)"
"Tumbler" (3)
"Turkey Day Walkabout"(2)
"TW3" (3)
"Tweety Pie" (2)
"Twenty to Life" (5)
"Twismas Tunes" (5)
"Twisted Sister" (4)
"Two Americas" (4)
"Two Americas" (9)
"Two Steps Back" (4)
"Two Thousand, Ate" (4)
"Unademdaze" (4)
"Unborn in the USA" (6)
"Unbroken Circle" (7)
"Unconditional Surrender"
"Unconventional, you say?"(7)
"Underdog Shmunderdog"(4)
"Unmarked Grave" (6)
"Untimely Events"
"UR Number Is Up" (7)
"Vacation Brouhaha" (3)
"Vacation Comin'" (2)
"Vandals at the Gates"(2)
"Vat of Chocolate"(6)
"Vero Possumus" (4)
"Veto Shmetoe (2)"
"Vick Drops, Cough!" (3)
"Video Thriller"(5)
"Vinson Can Gogh"(6)
"Virgin Birth" (2)
"Virginia is 4 Lovers"(4)
"Virginia Lovers" (4)
"Vom Winde Verweht" (2)
"Vote for Steve" (2)
"Vote Frodo (Not)"(7)
"W is for Wuss""
"Wait 'til Next Year" (2)
"Wait 'Til Next Year"(2)A
"Walkin' in the Woods"(5)
"Walkin' the Dogs"(8)
"Walkin' the Walk"
"Wall of Libertad"
"War on Middle Class"(2)
"War on Tara"
"Warm Bucket of Spit"(4)
"Was Miers His Attorney?"
"Watch Mr. Wizard" (3)
"Water Into Wine" (11)
"Water into Wine?"
"Watts da plan, Man?"(5)
"Wayne Johnson"(4)
"We Make a Better Day"(5)
"We Sank a Truck"
"We Will Rock You"
"Weather Channel Follies"
"Weddin' Down South" (3)
"Wedding Bell Blues"
"Weeds Way Is Up?"(5)
"Weepy Seepy Peepee"(3)
"Welcome Home, Soldier"
"Well, Duh!"
"Well, Poop"(8)
"West Wing Redux" (2)
"What Goes Around" (6)
"What if JR Shot Back"(9)
"What is a Shimkus?" (2)
"What Mark Felt"
"What Schedule?" (2)
"What Time Is It (2)"
"What We Have Here (2)"
"What Would Mitt Do?"(3)
"What's A Cubit?"
"What's a Sgarbi?" (5)
"What, Me Worry?"
"What, Me Worry?" (3)
"Where Sun Doan Shine"(8)
"Where's Frodo?" (5)
"Where's my puppy?"(4)
"Where's the Beef?"
"Where's the Fire?"(5)
"Whither Frodo?"
"Whitman's Sampler"(6)
"Who Dat Say Who Dat?"
"Who dat?" (2)
"Who did it?" (2)
"Who Torted?"
"Who Was That Guy?" (5)
"Who's In Line?"(6)
"Who's We, White Boy?"(3)
"Why are you here"?(3)
"Why are you here?" (3)
"Why Black Folks Cheered"
"Wiccan I do for you?"(2)
"Wicked Pickett"
"Wide Stance" (4)
"Will better be?"(7)
"Willard" (7)
"Willie B had heart" (5)
"Winchester Women (2)"
"Wink at the Moon"
"Winter Solstice"
"Wishin' and Hopin'"
"Wither Channels" (5)
"Wither Weather"(9)
"Wither Weather?"(4)
"WMD in the Shire"(6)
"Words To Live By"(7)
"Workin' on Night Moves"
"Worst Candidate Ever"(8)
"Worth Waiting For?"(5)
"Write a Letter" (7)
"Writer's Block" (2)
"Wrong Again, Frodo"(3)
"Wyomin' Gloamin'" (2)
"Xmas in Shreveport"(6)
"Yahoo" (4)
"Yankee Humor" (5)
"Yankee Ingenuity"
"Yella Rose a Taxes"(4)
"Yellow Peril" (3)
"Yes, No, Who Knows?" (2)
"You Betcha" (6)
"You Put Your Eye Out"(2)
"You Snake in the Grass"
"You Take the High Road"
"Zimmerman Noted"(6)
"Zinni in Bloom (2)"
"Zounds, Sounds!" (5)
"Zounds, you varlet"(4)
Southern Pine Beetles"(4)
The H Word" (6)
Citizens of Middle Earth
The Fellowship of the Ring
The Return of the King
Frodo, Keeper of the Ring
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Won't You Play Another Somebody Done Somebody Wrong Song
Mood:  lyrical
Topic: "Peaceful Easy Feelin"(3)

"Long Road Out of Eden" is an album that will soon join the 120 million already sold by a group of 60 year-olds known as The Eagles.  This time however, they risk a political theme or two as the clouds of climate change and war obscure the horizon.  Frodo notes the fact that this album has been six years in the making, and that sends him off to research exactly how long it took Michelangelo to paint the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel.  The reviews that Frodo has seen so far seem to indicate that although the music isn't memorable, the lyrics soar, as if penned by a real live Eagle.

The title track reprises the good-time driving that the Eagles produced so many years ago in the classic song "Take It Easy."  Frodo hears "music blasting from an SUV on a bright and sunny day rolling down the interstate in the good ol' USA."  Then, from the opposite direction, a drunk-driver, "weaving down the American highway through the litter and the wreckage and the cultural junk bloated with entitlement, loaded on propaganda."  The song ends with, taa daa (as promoted by Frodo), Julius Caesar, saying:  "The road to empire is a bloody, stupid waste."

From political point to what seems to be a Barack Obama argument for change, the sign off of the album are the words "The curtain falls, I take my bow, that's how it's meant to be.  It's your world now."

Words and music, music and words; available at Wal-Mart, and Frodo wonders if he can still dance to the music?


Posted by loveysdaddyga at 8:38 PM EDT
Updated: Tuesday, October 30, 2007 8:59 PM EDT
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Sunday, October 28, 2007
We Made Our Mistakes Along The Way
Mood:  sharp
Topic: "Dueling Banjos" (3)

Some years ago Frodo gave up news magazines, not because he didn't like them but because the unread simply assumed gargantuan status in almost every available nook and cranny.  Occasionally however, a cover catches his eye, and a single-item purchase seems completely justified.  Such is the case with the October 29th edition of NEWSWEEK which, on the cover, has a photograph of angry Islamic students with a title "The Most Dangerous Nation In The World Isn't Iraq."  The article itself is both engrossing and fully worth the purchase price of the magazine, but it was something else inside that really struck Frodo's imagination.

Recognizing Frodo's penchant for life imitating art, it was Christopher Dickey, son of the author James, who penned a single page article which brought a racing mind to the starting gate.  Celebrating the DVD re-release of "Deliverance," Dickey compares the screenplay of his father with the events leading up to and including the Pre-Emptive Iraq War.

In summary, the plot was simple enough, four suburbanites from Atlanta go canoeing in the mountains and find out that the wild river and the people around it are much more than what they anticipated.  The character Lewis (portrayed by Burt Reynolds) is the "ubermensch" who believes that it is his destiny to overcome against all obstacles.  In the end however, it is Ed (portrayed by Jon Voight), the ordinary man, who transcends himself in order to survive.  He is motivated entirely by fear and like the rest of the entourage (Ronny Cox and Ned Beatty), believes that Lewis is a little bit nuts.

Dickey agrees with them, and compares Lewis to Vice President Dick Cheney's "closet fantasy of himself" and, indeed, the entire Bush administration.   Ed is merely all the rest of us, and we are running the rapids of a river that is the Iraq War.

One of the locals in the movie asks Lewis "What the hell you want to go fucking around with that river for?," and Lewis responds, "Because it's there."  The local pauses, then says "It's there all right.  You get in and you can't get out, you gonna wish it wasn't."

Dickey asserts that, after 9/11, the destruction of the Taliban government in Afghanistan wasn't a weighty enough challenge for the would-be supermen. Now add in the fact that Lewis is portrayed as a rich boy from Atlanta, whose money came from inherited wealth, who is challenged by survival from near-death experiences.  That scenario is little different from a government that is supposed to brake the self-serving when danger and confusion occur.  The "core coterie" of ideologues in the Bush administration, none of whom were ever more than weekend warriors, pushed for war at all costs and an end to almost all constraints.

In the end, the survivors slay one of the mountain men and then argue over what to do with the body.  When Drew (Ronny Cox) argues that they should tell the police, Lewis denigrates his reference to "the law."  Lewis argues for a vote in the name of "democracy," and the terrified companions opt to hide the evidence. 

"Democracy" squeals like a piggy, and Ned Beatty is thus characterized in our collective memory, and he becomes Everyman. 

Posted by loveysdaddyga at 11:08 AM EDT
Updated: Sunday, October 28, 2007 11:48 AM EDT
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Saturday, October 27, 2007
There Never Seems To Be EnoughTime To Do The Things That You Want To Do
Mood:  rushed
Topic: "Fall Ball" (3)

The hummingbird feeder, for the first time in many days, doesn't need to be refilled.  It will be several hours before patches of sunshine will be warm enough for the chair, that sits empty now, to serve as a fitting point of observation for the goings-on in the Gardens of the Shire.  Ground and aerial rodents dart back-and-forth as the avian visitors compete for the seeds intended for immediate consumption and/or storage.  Although Frodo is want to tarry, Fiona and Mick, the Wonder Dog, race through the dew-laden stems of grass, leaving behind tell-tale pawprints weaving ribbons of passage in the sunlight.  There are games afoot, and cooler temperatures demand action both fast and furious.

Although there is less time available for the tasks at hand, there is greater desire to mix need with appreciation.  Colors and breezes change around every corner, and Frodo knows that there will be fewer and fewer moments such as these, and how he laments that fact.  Mick, the Wonder Dog, meets the eyes of Frodo with the challenge of the playmate, and, perhaps, of one who worships his friend.  These are grand moments to be shared, and no one wants to waste a precious second. 

"I have only just a minute, only 60 seconds in it, 

Forced upon me, can't refuse it.

Didn't  seek it, didn't choose it,

But it's up to me to use it.

I must suffer if I lose it,

Give account if I abuse it.

Just a tiny little minute,

But eternity is in it.

What are you going to do with your minute?"

---Dr. Benjamin F. Mays


Posted by loveysdaddyga at 10:53 AM EDT
Updated: Saturday, October 27, 2007 10:55 AM EDT
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Wednesday, October 24, 2007
Even Though We Ain't Got Money, I'm So In Love With Ya Honey
Mood:  on fire
Topic: "George to the Rescue"(3)

Air Force One will take off for the West Coast immediately after George W. Bush finishes his breakfast ("Fruit Loops" and  Texas Toast) and morning exercise regimen (one-half hour on a stationary bicycle) (why would you be surprised ?).  On the flight to California he will receive the Daily Intelligence Briefing by satellite telephone from the Director of the CIA.  The Secretary of State will appear on the closed-circuit television, presumably to exhibit the new shoes she purchased for her upcoming trip to Myanmar.  The Secretary of the Department of Homeland Insecurity will then personally brief Mr. Bush and the Chairman of the Republican National Committee on the number of registered Republicans and Independents requiring Federal Disaster Assistance.  Mr. Bush will then take a brief nap.

Following is the staff-prepared plan for the whirlwind visit:

There will be no photographs of Mr. Bush looking out of the windows of the airplane at any point. 

Prior to landing in Los Angeles, Mr. Bush will meet with the staff from Faux News and Bill Orally.  The "team representative" from all other media will receive hand-outs from the cute little honey who replaced Tony Snow.  What is her name, anyway?

On the Tarmac Mr. Bush will speak briefly to the people of California before a helicopter flight over the fire damage in wealthy Orange County.  After landing and while walking through the rubble of the pool house outside the Malibu residence of Travis Tritt, Mr. Bush will speak briefly to the African-American housecleaner.  At this point, staff should ensure that Mr. Bush does not accidentally refer to her as "Mammy."

Governor and Mrs. Schwarzenegger will then escort Mr. Bush in the State Humvee to the Charles Gibson Viewing Stand where Mr. Bush will speak to the California National Guard, the 101st Airborne, the Veterans of Foreign Wars, and Geraldo Rivera.  It should be noted that fires will be visible in the distance.  Should they be waning at this point, Secretary of Labor Chao (aka Mrs. Mitch McConnell) will casually pour several quarts of cologne on the flames to increase the effect for the cameras.

Mr. Bush will then take a short helicopter flight around Lake Arrowhead, north of San Diego.  News photographers will fly in a separate craft so that pictures can be taken of Mr. Bush tossing fire retardant out of the open door of the helicopter.  Note that in order to prevent any potential danger, the retardant will actiually be released over Lake Arrowhead itself.

Mr. Bush will then return to Air Force One.  He is scheduled to return to the White House next Monday, after a short vacation at the Ranch in Crawford. 

There are times when Frodo seems omniscient.     

Posted by loveysdaddyga at 8:59 PM EDT
Updated: Wednesday, October 24, 2007 9:03 PM EDT
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Monday, October 22, 2007
People Say I'm Lazy Dreaming My Life Away
Mood:  special
Topic: "Jefferson Rock" (3)

In June of 1861, one of Frodo's Great-Grandfathers traveled to what was then Harper's Ferry, Virginia, in order to enlist in General Lee's Army.  Frodo has never assessed that act, or any of those subsequent, as treasonous; merely as best judgment at the time.  Frodo is keenly aware that many others, even today, disagree with him.  Feeling no pain, he merely swipes his head with regret for the deficiency in understanding.

Frodo's Great-Grandfather could not, in Frodo's opinion, have failed to step up upon "Jefferson Rock" and partake of the vista that spread itself for him on that day in that place.  Thomas Jefferson, standing on that very spot, had proclaimed this to be the grandest of all the scapes of this new land.  Despite his efforts against the nation divided, many of Frodo's Great-Grandfathers'  progeny who might also possibly stand in that spot would, in behalf of that divided nation,  someday sacrifice the ability to return.  Today, the eyes belonged to Frodo, feeling however, that his sight was shared

The dull magentas, browns, and yellows of the hardwoods, are a coverlet to the mountains, cliffs, and bridges above the shallow Shenandoah.  The life blood, which riffles on a timeless and patient flow to a faraway sea, moves at it has for years far more numerous than the multiples of a hundred known to those who have stood upon Jefferson Rock.  It looks much today as it must have looked when the boot of Mr. Jefferson formed the print that today contains all of the Hobbits' foot.  There is a sense of awe for him, and for Frodo's Great-Grandfather, and for each since who stood here and made a silent promise to return when peace was restored.  Places such as this generate such dreams, those that live beyond that which is given to a single mortal, to be shared by all who follow.

A gentle, life-giving, mist was falling when Frodo finally turned away.  Perhaps there was a message there.  Perhaps not.  Likely it is that another must come.          

Posted by loveysdaddyga at 9:53 PM EDT
Updated: Monday, October 22, 2007 10:35 PM EDT
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Tuesday, October 16, 2007
Find Me a Rock And Roll Band That Needs a Helping Hand
Mood:  quizzical
Topic: "Seen Any Blue Swans?"(3)

Willem de Vlamingh (by the way, did Frodo mention that you should now be taking notes for the test at the end of this lesson?) arrived in Australia from Holland in 1697, and promptly confronted something that the entire civilized world believed did not exist; he encountered black swans.  His discovery forced Europeans to accept the fact that an obvious and accepted belief, i.e. that all swans are white, might actually prove to be incorrect.  This realization probably did not sit well with several established religious groups at the time.

Frodo brings this up because of a new book, appropriately named "The Black Swan," and subtitled "The Impact of the Highly Improbable," written by Dr. Nassim Nicholas Taleb.  Dr. Taleb's theorem is that unlikely events seem impossible when they lie in the unknown or in the future, however, after they occur, they become a part of our readily accepted reality.  Taleb argues that our lives are the cumulative effect of a number of significant shocks that have taken place in our environment that were far different from what was planned or expected.  He uses the theory to argue that America's place in the global economy is strengthened by the fact that we have not learned to fear failure.  Rather, as entrepreneurs our collective successes have more to do with what is unplanned as opposed to what is predictable.

Frodo was struck by one of Taleb's examples, which he dubbed the "Harry Potter Phenomenon."  He merely pointed out that the authoress was, when she wrote her first book, a mother on welfare.  The unpredictable success of her product obviously changed her life, and was, therefore, a "Black Swan."  Other examples used by Dr. Taleb were the internal combustion engine; the Cuban Revolution; the personal computer; the 1990's Internet stock bubble; and World War II.  Each of these events became a "Black Swan" because of the unintended consequences which followed.

Frodo would like to introduce another "Black Swan."  George W. Bush may be the penultimate unintended consequence in the modern world.  For some, his very existence is evidence of a night of passion gone awry.  Others look upon him as a mannequin, dressed and posing, mindlessly, without an unscripted moment and, therefore, a figurehead.  Still others, it seems, regard him as a bulwark against uncontrolled and uncontrollable government.  Frodo argues that all have been confounded by what has actually taken place.  Frodo also hopes that the entrepreneurial spirit of the American people has not been diminished by the most colossal of all our failures.

Frodo will be doing his best Charles Kuralt impersonation for the next several days dear reader.  If the opportunity avails itself, and you happen across a weary traveler sipping an RC and eating a "Moon Pie" in front of an old country store, stop and sit a spell, you might meet Frodo up close and personal.  Talk about a "black Swan," you stop to fill the tank and you come face-to-face with a Hobbit. 

"Now, take out a piece of paper and number from one to ten. . ."    

Posted by loveysdaddyga at 9:17 PM EDT
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Monday, October 15, 2007
I Wish It Would Rain
Mood:  rushed
Topic: "DroughtExitStragedy"(3)

Political discussions in the Shire today are all about the weather.  The "Bermuda High" which traditionally sits atop the Southeastern USA at this time of year, spiraling clockwise, pushes precipitous possibilities into the periphery, i.e. Texas (which certainly meets almost any definition of periphery).  The result being that much of the area abounding the Gardens of the Shire is as much as a foot-and-a-half behind the normal annual rainfall for this point in the year, and all of this carries over from similar readings in the prior year.  The only remotely amusing aspect is the fallout from political leaders recognizing that voters care more about rain than they do plebiscites and millage rates.

Atlanta is very visible in the cross-hairs.  As the State of Georgia considers restrictions on commercial and industrial users, beyond the total ban on outdoor watering for residential use, water experts around the nation are shocked by the dire consequences which restrictions place on Metro Atlanta.  Mr. Don Wilhite, who founded the National Drought Mitigation Center at the University of Nebraska-Lincoln, is quoted as saying "Most large metropolitan areas have systems in place where they try to be better managers of the resource than (Georgia). . ."

Zing.  And those are pretty strong words emanating from a University with a losing football team. 

Georgia Governor Sonny Perdue (who bears an uncanny likeness to "Curly" of the "Three Stooges") has his political shoes on, and is dancing his best to convince voters that this is neither his fault, nor his responsibility.  Sonny, it seems, is being mentioned by many of the Midgets contending for the Republican Party Presidential nod as a potential Veep nominee.  The back door to the Governor's Mansion on West Paces Ferry road is aswing with advisors at all levels; all in the effort to keep Sonny on the short list.

Frodo's grim countenance on this bleak day was brightened by the appearance of a familiar face exiting from the Governor's Mansion.

Donald Rumsfeld.  Now that's the kind of advice Sonny really needs.  Frodo wonders where Ambassador Bremer is?  Frodo would pay his expenses.



Posted by loveysdaddyga at 10:16 PM EDT
Updated: Monday, October 15, 2007 10:18 PM EDT
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Sunday, October 14, 2007
You Can See The Stars And Still Not See The Light
Mood:  hug me
Topic: "Red Sky at Morning" (3)

Frodo and Sam deviate from their quest up Mount Doom to actually visit Sauron's seat of power.  On Saturday next they will watch two young people unite for their common future; it has been a long time since the Hobbits have been to a Wedding.  At this point in time, funerals are much more common.  Frodo hoped also to make time for a short visit to Bilbo's last remaining brother while in the vicinity.  However, recent events in that part of Middle Earth holds the promise of a pinkish tint when the morrow comes.

Legolas received word that his "stress test" required additional attention.  He will have bypass surgery when the sun rises. 

Gimli, after discussions with multiple specialists, has been found to have committed such a crime against one, James Parkinson, that he has been infected with a "Disease" named after the offended party.

Bilbo's brother, wounded in the first two hours of fighting on the beach at Okinawa when he was but an 18 year-old Marine, underwent triple bypass surgery and rests in a Coronary Care Unit as Frodo pens these lines.

Bilbo has had treatments to deaden the nerve endings in the back, so that sleep can return to the cycle of days and nights again.

There is, to life, an unpredictable aspect which assures only that, after good times, bad will follow.  It is not as if Frodo has been unaware that a "bad moon" may be on the rise.  Frodo does not have either the time or the inclination to lament the challenges placed before him; he knows that much depends on him and it is what he expected when he took up the task to destroy the Ring.

Little Georgia, the inhabitant of the Shire to whom every day has been Christmas, will suffer no more beyond the morrow.  The task of "dominion" is both judgmental and compassionate.  Frodo and Sam will long remember the courage of a chihuahua mix, blind in one eye, partially deaf, with heartworms, who added her bark to the pack.  She will have an honored spot in the Gardens of the Shire.  She deserves no less.

It will be nice when Frodo can stop fouling off curve balls, and return a fast ball past the ear of Fate directly over the center-field wall.   



Posted by loveysdaddyga at 7:58 PM EDT
Updated: Sunday, October 14, 2007 8:00 PM EDT
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Saturday, October 13, 2007
To The Gypsy That I Was
Mood:  spacey
Topic: "Japanese Movie?" (3)

The Men of Gondor gathered again to share chicken cooked in a clay oven and the breadlike creation which provides basic sustenance for over a tenth of all the population of Middle Earth.  The chicken wasn't much to rave about thought Frodo, but this Nanna stuff is pretty good.  A little apple butter and he would have a whole new appreciation for that part of the world that seems to answer all his telephone calls anymore.  From there it was but a short jaunt to little Oglethorpe where, Frodo joked, he could enjoy an afternoon with "Mothra" and "Godzilla."  Frodo feigned shock to find out that "Rodan" was actually some short, little Belgian guy who made statues out of hands and heads. 

In truth, Rodin was a musician for his age.  In times such as these, where art is music and music is art, the work of Rodin represents the art that is no longer present in the Hobbit culture.  Although there are many who sculpt and paint, the only terminology for this age is "Rock and Roll."  It is, to Frodo, a matter of focus.  Witness the words of a prophet which, if you will, are written on a subway wall.

George Carlin has said that Americans prefer to focus on the sideshows and to ignore the big picture.  "People have lost interest in governing themselves," he observed, "for the sake of gizmos and toys.  They sold out for Jet Skis and cellphones and Salad Shooters and leaf blowers.  It is just a shame, for it will be the ruin of this country.  It is fun to watch however." 

Anna Nicole Smith is back in the news.  That, Frodo supposes, is the point made by Prophet Carlin.  That, and that none of Mitt Romney's five sons have yet signed up for a tour in the US Military.  And the beat goes on, probably with an air guitar accompaniment. 


Posted by loveysdaddyga at 11:13 AM EDT
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Wednesday, October 10, 2007
What a Day For a Daydream
Mood:  silly
Topic: "Overdue Books" (3)

In the spirit of non-partisan good government, Frodo has written a letter to the General Services Administration suggesting that the George W. Bush Presidential Library be located within the confines of the United States Embassy in Baghdad.  Most people know that this edifice, when completed, will be the largest, most expensive, such building in all the world.  Would it not be fitting, Frodo argued, that the location of the war of longest duration, and least consequence, in American History should contain a memorial to poor research and historical ignorance?  The possibilities for documenting the folly of war merit serious consideration of Frodo's proposal.

The Richard Cheney Memorial Storm Cellar would make future generations forever immune to references of "Dugout Doug" MacArthur of World War II genre.  Cheney was assigned to underground duty while the Incomparable Moron flitted from elementary schools to Shreveport on September 11th.  Afterwards, Cheney was rarely observed doing anything in, or for, the public.

The Larry Craig Restroom Stalls would have doors that swing both ways.  This action would serve as an ever-mindful warning for clandestine raconteurs that it takes more than a wide stance to repel an insurgency.

The Alberto Gonzales Telecommunications Center would symbolize the totality of information gathered in the national defense during times of crisis.  By simply pushing a button, any national defense operative could obtain access to any portion of the former Attorney General's testimony before the Congress of the United States, translated into any one of more than 235 languages, and 114 dialects thereof.  "I don't recall" is particularly appealing in Hawaiian, at least it is to Frodo.

Then, of course the mind boggles at all the other reminders of this grandifluorous time in world history, there are the books and records themselves, all gathered and maintained in mint condition.  Every document that was published for any purpose whatsoever during the simply unforgettable Bush White House years.  Yes, dear reader, the absolutely pristine, untouched by human hand, information which could have guided our national goals to new heights is now available to you for only $19.95 plus shipping & handling.  If you choose to visit the library itself, you will be able to research any of the non-classified items in the area known as Barney's Reading Room.  

Be sure to look for the autographed copy of "My Pet Goat."   You're paying for it you know, big time. 

Posted by loveysdaddyga at 8:57 PM EDT
Updated: Wednesday, October 10, 2007 8:59 PM EDT
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