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" Citizen Soldiers" (5)
" Putin' Out" (5)
" Thin Ice"(9)
""I Ain't Got Much" (5)
""Soft Memories" (7)
"$100, Are You Sure?" (5)
"0 Preservative Added"(2)
"105 Minute Workday"(9)
"16 Percent Factor"(3)
"176,000,000 to 1"(8)
"26 Damn Dollars"(6)
"3 Percent Turnout" (2)
"37 Come 11" (5)
"3:10 to Yuma" (7)
"50 Weeks of Reality TV"
"501 (c)(4)"
"54 Pounds" (8)
"8.8 Pounds"(6)
"A Capitol Idea" (6)
"A Code in My Node"
"A Course is a Course"(2)
"A Day At The Beach" (3)
"A Dog Named Bo" (5)
"A Hobbit of an Idea"
"A Man's Army"
"A Patriot Act" (7)
"A Patriotic Act"
"A Perfect World"
"A soldier booed?'(7)
"A Space Odyssey" (4)
"A Taxing Story" (5)
"A Thousand Campfires"(4)
"A Three Hour Tour"(8)
"A Touch of Class"(5)
"A Waisted Day" (5)
"A Woman Scorned"
"Aagh,I'll Pay,I'll Pay"
"Abe Wong, of Gondor"(5)
"Act I, Scene I" (8)
"Act I, Scene II" (8)
"Act I, Scene III" (8)
"Adjustable 2nd Card"(3)
"Adjusting Policies"
"Adjusting the Clock"(8)
"Aegean Adventure" (2)
"Ah ah ah Stayin' Alive"
"Airline Highway" (5)
"Alan Scott" (7)
"All Aboard"
"All Bets Are In" (2)
"All Charged Up"
"All Good Things" (4)
"Allah Be Praised" (5)
"Almost Heaven" (2)
"Alpha Dog"(7)
"Alright, Who Did It?"(7)
"Also Sprach Frodo" (4)
"Always Wear Gloves" (3)
"AM Radio Next?"
"America's Toilet" (6)
"American Cemetery"(8)
"An Admission"
"An Apple A Day" (7)
"An Hour A Day" (6)
"An Ugly American"(4)
"Anchorman" (6)
"And the Winner Is" (2)
"Andy Griffith Redux"
"Another Single Woman?"
"Another Three-namer"(5)
"Another Time/Place"(4)
"Anvil Throwin' Time"(8)
"Apocalypse Now?" (3)
"Aragorn" (4)
"Armored Dildos" (3)
"As Far As We Know" (2)
"Ask Ann Landers" (3)
"Assembly LineDancing"(4)
"Astronaughty" (2)
"Atlanta Times Three"
"Augmentation" (2)
"Augustus Agonistes" (5)
"Aurora Borealis" (8)
"Autumnal Observances"(2)
"Avast You Lubbers"(6)
"Baby Doctors (2)"
"Baby Fiona"(7)
"Baby Nathan Yahoo"(10)
"Back Door Basra (2)"
"Back inthe Saddle Again"
"Bad Boys, Bad Boys"
"Bad Time for Bonzo" (3)
"Balance of Nature" (3)
"Balance of Payments"(5)
"Balancing the Budget"
"Ballamer" (4)
"Bang the Drum Slowly"
"Bank Prank" (5)
"Baptists are Pussies"(7)
"Barbed Wire Escape (2)"
"Barbie Banditos" (3)
"Barely Bearble"(7)
"Barely Defensible" (2)
"Barry Me Not (2)"
"Bathroom onna Right"(3)
"Beach Music" (7)
"Because It Is Hard" (4)
"Beechwood 4-5789"(6)
"Belling the Cat" (2)
"Ben McGee" (3)
"Benny and the Jets"(5)
"Berlusconi in Love"(6)
"Best be straight Boy"(5)
"Best Day/Worst Day"(6)
"Best in the South" (5)
"Best in the World?"(5)
"Betray Us" (3)
"Bettah than Etta"(4)
"Better Man" (3)
"Better Than Pong"
"Big Time Sports" (3)
"Big Words,LittleMind"(6)
"Bilbo's Birthday (2)"
"Bilbo's Little Boy"(5)
"Bilbo's Revenge" (5)
"Bill and Hillary (2)"
"Billy World" (2)
"Bimini Babes" (3)
"Bird is the Word" (3)
"Birmingham Jail" (5)
"Birthday Baggins"
"Birthday Buddies" (7)
"Birthday Memory" (4)
"Birthin' No Babies" (3)
"Bishop to King's Castle"
"Black Friday" (2)
"Black Gold, Texas Tea"
"Black Hole Blues" (4)
"Black Jack"
"Black Russians" (6)
"Black Widow" (3)
"Blackboard Jungle"
"Blame Game" (3)
"Bleached Bones" (5)
"Blitzkrieg Bellini" (2)
"Blood and Swash" (3)
"Bloopers" (5)
"Blue Christmas" (2)
"Bo's Birthday"(5)
"Bob Sikes' Cut"(9)
"Bob, Bob, Bobbit" (3)
"Bobby, not Ben"(6)
"Bon Air Bellicose" (4)
"Bon Giorno" (6)
"Bona Lisa" (5)
"Bonds-v-Skvara" (3)
"Boo Boo Poo Poo"(9)
"Boromir & Galadriel"(5)
"Bottled in Thyme"(7)
"Bottom Ten"(9)
"Bovine Stem Cells?"
"Boy, I Say Boy"
"Boycott BP"
"Breaker, Breaker" (4)
"Breakin' rules" (7)
"Breaking News" (7)
"Brer Fox (2)"
"Bridge at Andau"(11)
"Bring Back Ross" (2)
"Bring the Bowl"
"Broken News"(10)
"Brother of the Ring"
"Brownback Mountain"
"Brownie Hawkeye"
"Buckwheat Breathes" (2)
"Bumper Sticker"
"Burn Baby, Burn" (3)
"Bush in the Bullrushes"
"Bush Baby, Bush (2)"
"Bush is Chinese?" (2)
"Bush Press Conference"
"Bush-Bashers Be We (2)"
"Busman's Holiday(2)"
"Butt...Butt...Butt" (3)
"Butterflies? Sheesh!"
"Buttermilk Drops" (3)
"Buy a Subaru" (11)
"Buy Stock in America"(6)
"Cabin Fever" (5)
"Cain Not Able" (7)
"Cake in the Rain"
"Cake in the Rain"(3)
"Call Me Ishmael" (3)
"Callista, an Albino?"(7)
"Camp Pleasant" (2)
"Can She Name Them?(2)"
"Can You Hear Me Now?"
"Canaan Conspiracy"(6)
"Candygram" (4)
"Captive Audience"(6)
"Caramel or Carmel?"(3)
"Carolina Cougar(2)"
"Carolina Curmudgeon" (5)
"Cartoon Characters" (3)
"Case of Packy Stann"(3)
"Cash crash crashed?"(5)
"Cat Fight" (5)
"Caterpillar Quandry" (3)
"Causal Relationships"(9)
"Cause It's One, (2)"
"Ceramic s"
"Ch-ch-changin'" (4)
"Change a'comin" (5)
"Change is Good" (5)
"Change?" (3)
"Changin' Channels" (2)
"Chapter 13"
"Chariots of Fire"
"Chariots' a' Comin'"(4)
"Chassahowitzka" (2)
"Chauncey Gardner"(7)
"Chemical Alley" (6)
"Cheney of Fools" (2)
"Cherem" (3)
"Chew my Gazebo, Willya?"
"Chief Noc-a-Homa" (3)
"Chingachgook Lives"
"Chipmonkeys Alert (2)"
"Chipper" (6)
"Christian Balls"(10)
"Christian the Lion"(4)
"Christian Valuelessness"
"Christmas Communique"(3)
"Christmas, 1936" (2)
"Chutzpah Hooters" (4)
"Cilled a Bar?" (3)
"Cindy, oh Cindy"(4)
"Citizen Soldiers" (2)
"Clark and Lois (2)"
"Classified Ads are Cool"
"Claymore Gregg" (3)
"Clean Machine" (2)
"Clean up in Aisle 4!"(4)
"Climb It Chains" (8)
"Clinton Cuts" (7)
"Clone Chipper,Please"(4)
"Cockatiel Lounge" (2)
"College of the Shire"(6)
"Combat Kelly (2)"
"Come On Baby"(8)
"Come on Down" (3)
"Comin' Clean" (5)
"Comin' Home" (3)
"Commencement (2)"
"Comparables" (6)
"Condi for President" (3)
"Cone of Silence" (4)
"Conflagration" (3)
"Confusion Reigns"(10)
"Congress Goes to War (2)
"Congress' Schmidthead"
"Conspiracy Theory" (4)
"Copy Cat Chinese" (5)
"Country Roads" (7)
"Crawford Convention" (2)
"Crikey" (2)
"Crime and Punishment(2)"
"Crotch Rocket Delite"(4)
"Cult of the Wild"(7)
"Curious, George?"
"Currahee" (5)
"Da Juice Is Back" (3)
"Dad" (5)
"Damages Done (2)"
"Damn Close" (4)
"Damn It To Hell" (5)
"Damn Lies" (7)
"Dandy Dale" (7)
"Danger Will Robinson"(5)
"Danger,Will Robinson"(8)
"Darth Dick" (5)
"Darwin's Company" (4)
"Das Boot"
"Das Ende" (6)
"Date With David" (2)
"Day of Infamy" (4)
"Day-O, Me Wan Go"(7)
"De Tar-Ball Baby" (6)
"Dead Honkey"
"Dearest Bilbo"
"Debits on the Left?" (2)
"Decisions, Decisions"(6)
"Deep and Dark" (5)
"Deep Shiite" (3)
"Degree of Separation"(6)
"Deja 1958 Over Again"
"Deja Who?"(7)
"Delano" (4)
"Diazinon Ditties (2)"
"Dick Clark Top 10(2)"
"Dimmer Switch" (6)
"Dirty Copter" (4)
"Do They Like Kool Aid?"
"Doctor, Mr. MD"(9)
"Dodged a Bullet"(7)
"Dogmobile" (3)
"Dogs Rule"
"Doing the Right Thing"
"Don't Cut My DSL" (5)
"Don't Feed the Animals"
"Dont Touch That Dial"(6)
"Doofus" (9)
"Doohan's Delight" (3)
"Doris Miller" (6)
"Dorothy Rose" (4)
"Double Deal" (6)
"Doubting Thomases" (3)
"Doug Williams"(4)
"Dover" (4)
"Down Below Back Home"(4)
"Downtown Cardinals"(9)
"Dr. Phil" (5)
"Dubai-Bye" (3)
"Dueling Banjos" (3)
"Dumb and Dumber" (3)
"Dumb As We Wanna Be"(3)
"Dumber Than Dirt" (3)
"Dumbest Politico (2)"
"Eager Uighurs" (4)
"Early Admission" (8)
"Eight Nine Four" (4)
"Elect Jeff Jackson"(10)
"Elizabeth I" (5)
"Emily Latella Lives"
"Emperor's Clothes" (2)
"End of the Line"
"Ending Sams Patience"(7)
"Engine Uprisin'" (4)
"Ensign Pulver"(5)
"EOTUS" (5)
"Equinox Approaching"(10)
"Equinoxious" (4)
"Escalator Escalatin'"(5)
"ESP" (6)
"Etchings, Anyone?"(5)
"Ethel Merman Lives"
"Eve, It's Oil!"
"Evenin' Govnah" (6)
"Everyday Miracles"
"Evil Thoughts" (3)
"Eye Opener" (3)
"Eyes of a Gorilla"
"Fair is Fare"(7)
"Falcon" (8)
"Fall Ball" (3)
"Fallin' Behind"(11)
"Falling Apart" (9)
"Fargo Felines" (5)
"Fashionable Frodo" (5)
"Father Ed" (3)
"Faux les Bas" (2)
"Female Insurgency (2)"
"Ferengi or Ferangi?" (3)
"Fergit? Hell No!"
"Film at 11"
"Findin' William"(11)"
"Firing US Attorneys" (3)
"First Freeze" (6)
"First Learn to Lose"
"First National Bank" (5)
"First Sentence" (8)
"Five Easy Pieces" (4)
"Float Yer Boat" (4)
"Flower Power (2)"
"Foe Years Old" (4)
"Follow the Money"
"Followin' Ava" (4)
"For More Years" (3)
"Forbidden Fruit"
"Fords and Dads" (2)
"Foreclosure Follies" (7)
"Foreclosure Notice" (6)
"Forest Primeval"(8)
"Form 666" (3)
"Forms For Everything"(6)
"Foundling Fathers"(7)
"Fourteen Years Ago?"(5)
"Fox Views" (3)
"Frack You" (7)
"Frances Died Today"(7)
"Fred's Dead Head" (3)
"Free at Last"
"Free Hidden Telecast"(4)
"Freedom? Hell No" (3)
"Friend by Your Side" (3)
"Friend by your Side" (4)
"Friendly Persuasion" (5)
"Friends of Bill" (7)
"Frist Friends"
"Frodo and Housman" (2)
"Frodo and Jesus"
"Frodo and Revere?"(7)
"Frodo And Truckers (2)"
"Frodo Dissents" (6)
"Frodo Not Foggo (2)"
"Frodo of Arabia(2)"
"Frodo Op" (5)
"Frodo Regrets"
"Frodo Study Group" (2)
"Frodo visits Bilbo"
"Frodo's Almanac"(9)
"Frodo's Bad Day"
"Frodo's Book Club"(5)
"Frodo's Dilemma" (3)
"Frodo's Faux Pas" (3)
"Frodo's Final Four" (3)
"Frodo's Foreign Policy"
"Frodo's Hall of Fame"(4)
"Frodo's Newer Friend"(6)
"Frodo's Retirement"(8)
"Frodo's Revenge"
"Frodo's Revenge"(7)
"Frodo's Solutions" (6)
"Frodo's Xmas Story"(6)
"Frodo, James Frodo" (3)
"Furriners" (4)
"Gainful Employment" (3)
"Galadriel Is No More"(3)
"Gandalf's Challenge (2)"
"Garland Duesenberry" (2)
"Gas Guzzler A-Go-Go"
"Gasp, Wheeze (2)"
"Gay Faux Holes" (5)
"Genarlow de Chariot" (3)
"Genesis Ignored" (3)
"Geneva Accords Redux"
"Geography Lesson" (3)
"George to the Rescue"(3)
"Georgia on my Mind"(3)
"Getting Your Wish" (3)
"Gidget Goes Gondor"(7)
"Gimme Head With Hair"(3)
"Girls Night Out" (6)
"Give 'em Hell, Tom" (5)
"Give Heath a Chance (2)"
"Give Us Your Tired. . ."
"Giving Way to Anger" (2)
"Glenn Frey"(11)
"Glory Days"
"Goin' Home" (3)
"Gondor Goodfellas"(9)
"Gondor Gravitas" (3)
"Good Cop" (7)
"Good Day America" (6)
"Good Friday It Was"(9)
"Good Friday, Maybe"(11)
"Good Ol Mountain Dew"(5)
"Good Son"
"Goodbye Kids (2)"
"Goodbye, Ethan" (2)
"Goodman is Hard to Find"
"Goose Again"
"GOP Convention" (3)
"Gotta Have a Home (2)"
"Grading on a Curve"
"Graffiti Government" (2)
"Great American Hero"
"Great American Hero" (2)
"Greatest Duet Ever"(6)
"Greed is Good"(5)
"Greetings" (8)
"Grissom not Gruesome"(4)
"Groupies for Edwards"(4)
"Guess We Forgot?"(8)
"Guest Workers (2)"
"Guns of August" (7)
"Guts of August" (3)
"Gwinnett Again?" (3)
"Halo, 1,2,3?" (3)
"Ham I Am" (3)
"Handi-Wipes" (3)
"Hang 'em High" (2)
"Hanky Time, Ladies"
"Happens in Threes"(5)
"Happy Anniversary"(9)
"Happy Mardi Gras"(2)
"Harpo Speaks"
"Harry" (2)
"Harry's Bar-Venice" (2)
"Hawkeye, Redux"(7)
"Haz Mat" (3)
"He Ate the Olive!"(7)
"He is deeply missed (2)"
"He Picks Up Poop?" (5)
"He Took De Bait" (8)
"He's 'Little Ricky'?"(7)
"Healthcare for Frodo"(5)
"Heart Soar Like Hawk"(5)
"Heck of an Engineer"(7)
"Hedge Fund Hippies" (3)
"Heeeerrre's Frodo" (3)
"Heeere's Johnny" (6)
"Heeerrrre's Frodo" (3)
"Hello, Mr. Wilson" (5)
"Hello? Central?" (3)
"Help Wanted"
"Helping Frodo" (4)
"Here Come da Judge" (2)
"Here Come da Judge" (6)
"Here Kitty-Kitty" (4)
"Here Kitty-kitty"(5)
"Here's Help, Now Leave"
"Here's Your Watch" (3)
"Hi Jinx" (5)
"Hide Anythin' Edible"(5)
"High Chair" (2)
"Hobbits And a Truck"(4)
"Hold On Romo" (2)
"Hold the Malaise" (4)
"Honey Dew List"(9)
"Hopalong Frodo"(9)
"Horn of Africa (2)"
"Horse Latitudes" (6)
"Horsehockey" (3)
"Hosea Can You See" (3)
"Hosea Can You See?" (3)
"Hot Tamale" (3)
"Hotel Plimhimmon"(9)
"HOV or DOA?" (3)
"How Dogs Love Us" (10)
"How Many Delegates?"
"How Many Delegates?" (3)
"How Now Broun Cow"(8)
"Hraka" (4)
"Huckleberry Hound" (3)
"Hund Scheisse CSI" (5)
"Hungarian Answer" (4)
"I Believe in Music (2)"
"I can hope, can't I?"(9)
"I Could Cry" (2)
"I Inspired You?"
"I say it's Spinach. . ."
"I'll Get Back to You"(3)
"I'll Huff and Puff" (4)
"I'll Take a Vowel"
"I'm Baaack" (2)
"I'mSo In LoveWithYou"(7)
"Ides of March Again" (4)
"Ides of Texas" (6)
"IED's in Congress" (2)
"If Frodo Ran The DHS"(5)
"If It Ain't OneThing"(5)
"If the truth be told"(6)
"If You Remember,Then"(6)
"If" (6)
"Imagine,General Newt"(6)
"Imitation of Life" (5)
"Immigration Reform (2)"
"In a Galaxy Far Away(2)"
"In a Pig's Eye" (4)
"In Dog We Trust" (10)
"In the Beginning"
"In the Beginning" (3)
"Incomparable Moron" (4)
"Indoor Toilets Rule" (4)
"Intersex Village" (2)
"Interstate Parking (2)"
"Ion Propulsion"(7)
"Iran's Tom Hayden"
"Irish Spring"(3)
"Is it in the Water?"
"Is That in America?" (2)
"Is You da One,Jimmy?"(3)
"Islamic Fundamentals"(8)
"Isn't Amnesty Good?"(3)
"Isn't Change Good?"(6)
"It's A Trap" (6)
"It's Just a Movie"
"It's Just Business"
"Ja, Wir Konnen."
"Jack Crabb" (10)
"Jambo Jumbo" (3)
"Japanese Movie?" (3)
"Je suis Frodo"(10)
"Jefferson Rock" (3)
"Jes' the facts Ma'am"(4)
"Jim Crow" (5)
"Joad Family Reunion?"(6)
"Joad Jobs" (4)
"Joe Soptic" (8)
"Jonestown Redux" (3)
"Jose and Claudia" (4)
"Joshua Generation" (3)
"Just Another Day" (3)
"Just Clearin' Brush"(3)
"Just Desserts (2)"
"Just Desserts" (7)
"Just Say 'Nyet'"(7)
"Just to CU Smile" (5)
"Kandy Kakes 2"
"Ken Meets Jack"
"Key Word Apology" (6)
"Killer's Geraldine" (4)
"Kilowatts Per Mile" (6)
"Kiribati Republic"(6)
"Kirk Saves Nemo"
"Kiss a Girl Goodbye"(2)
"Knew You Not Pompey?"(3)
"Kodak Moment" (2)
"Kool Sailboat" (4)
"Korea, Korea" (2)
"Kudlow's Kreeps"(4)
"Lady of Rohan" (3)
"Land Ho"(8)
"Lean and Hungry " (2)
"Leeward, I Say, Leeward"
"Legs Diamond" (3)
"Legs" (3)
"Leslie" (4)
"Lessons Learned" (2)
"Let Them Eat Cake"
"Let's Bake Cookies" (3)
"Let's Play A Game" (6)
"Letter Home" (6)
"Letter to Lou" (4)
"Liberal Lament" (40)
"Lief, Leaf, or Loaf"(8)
"Life In A Red State"
"Lights of Chicago"
"Like a Barack" (2)
"Limbaugh Hero"(7)
"Lime Bandits" (3)
"Lime is on my side" (6)
"Limestone Cowboys" (3)
"Lip Smackin' Good?"(6)
"Little Big Horn (2)"
"Little Houdini" (5)
"Little Sky"
"Littlest Angel" (2)
"Livin' is Easy?"(7)
"Loans and Deposits" (4)
"Lois, I Never Lie"(8)
"Lonely Avenue" (3)
"Lonesome Frodo" (3)
"Look away Dixieland"(6)
"Look for da Union Label"
"Look Who's Talkin'" (2)
"Lookin' Back, Texas" (3)
"Lost Weekend"(8)
"Low Water, Slow Flow"(3)
"Lox? Or Locks?" (7)
"Lunatic Cattle Call"(8)
"M-G-M Material"
"Ma Bell is Baaack" (3)
"Ma Bell Lives" (7)
"Macaca, Your Macaca" (2)
"Mad Dogs&Englishmen"(6)
"Made You Look" (6)
"Magic Fridge (2)"
"Magic Moments"(7)
"Make Jobs, Not War"(7)
"MaMa's Little Babies"(3)
"Man For All Seasons" (2)
"Man of the Century"
"Man Up, Harry"(6)
"Man's Best Friend?"
"Many happy returns"
"March Forth" (8)
"Marking Time" (3)
"Martyr Magic" (2)
"Marvelous Mac"(8)
"Mary Lee & Genie"(8)
"Master of None" (8)
"May Day, Comrade"(7)
"Maynard G. Krebs" (7)
"Medal of Honor" (6)
"Media is the Message(2)"
"Media Reporting" (6)
"Mental Healthcare" (4)
"Michelle, my Belle"(7)
"Mick's Day"(8)
"Mickey and Me"(6)
"MidSummer Nights Dream"(7)
"Mikileaks" (6)
"Missionary Position" (3)
"Missionary Position" (7)
"Mississipp' Sippin'"(2)
"Mister Roberts" (8)
"Moamar:The Movie"(7)
"Mohair Sam" (5)
"Mon Petit Shoe"(4)
"Monkeys in Mississippi"
"Moody Blue"(7)
"Moody" (7)
"Mooman" (3)
"Moon Over Miami"(4)
"Mooosic" (5)
"Moovin' On Up" (2)
"Mordor or Antarctica?"
"More Than Some" (4)
"Moultrie Poultry" (3)
"Mount Mulch" (2)
"Movin' On Up" (2)
"Mr. Toad's Motorcar (2)"
"Mumbai, My Lord" (4)
"Murtha For President(2)"
"N. Leroy" (7)
"Name That Tune"(4)
"Nascaroil" (4)
"Nat King Cole Sucks"(5)
"NCAA---Blech!" (7)
"Nein, nein, nein"(7)
"Never Doubt Bilbo"
"Never heard of him"
"New Life, Old Leaves"(4)
"Newest Friend"(8)
"Newman's Own" (4)
"Newt/Mitt '12" (3)
"Next Case" (6)
"Next Door Neighbors" (3)
"NFL Commissioner (2)"
"NFL Trade" (3)
"Nielsen Ratings" (2)
"Nine Months PG" (7)
"Nixon Agonistes" (3)
"No Faux News?" (3)
"No Googling Allowed"(4)
"No Humor Today"
"No Peanut Left Behind"
"No Sale" (3)
"No, Not Russian" (4)
"No-No, No" (3)
"Nobody Even Asked"(8)
"Noo Yawk Stateamind"(2)
"Not a Bang,a Whimper"(7)
"Not Funny, Dr Jones"(5)
"Not North Carolina" (6)
"Not Percy Sledge?" (3)
"Not Percy Sledge?"(3)
"Number One" (3)
"Number Please?"(7)
"Number, Please"(8)
"Numbers Don't Lie" (3)
"Numbers Racket" (4)
"Obama Doctrine" (5)
"Obama's Generals"(5)
"October Dreamin'" (4)
"Ode to an Athlete (2)"
"Ogal Preston Crews (2)"
"Oh Kenny Boy (2)"
"Oh the possibilities"(8)
"Oh Ye White Whale" (3)
"Oh, Sadaharu" (2)
"OK Baptist Chorale" (4)
"Old McDonnell's Farm"(7)
"Old Time Baseball"(9)
"Old Times Topic" (6)
"Olympic Changes" (4)
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"Play Melancholy Baby"
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"Poll Results Just In"
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"Wait 'Til Next Year"(2)A
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"What, Me Worry?" (3)
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"Where's my puppy?"(4)
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"You Betcha" (6)
"You Put Your Eye Out"(2)
"You Snake in the Grass"
"You Take the High Road"
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"Zinni in Bloom (2)"
"Zounds, Sounds!" (5)
"Zounds, you varlet"(4)
Southern Pine Beetles"(4)
The H Word" (6)
Citizens of Middle Earth
The Fellowship of the Ring
The Return of the King
Frodo, Keeper of the Ring
Sunday, February 8, 2009
At First I Thought It Was Infatuation, But It's Lasted So Long
Mood:  a-ok
Topic: "New Life, Old Leaves"(4)

Detritus has been deposited in the Gardens of the Shire by cold daily winds for what seems like the longest of seasons.  Wet and rotting leaves find their way into every nook.  Even the industrious Hobbit has found good reason to let the swirl be, and to seek other tasks closer to the hearth.  Then, with little warning, the clime dawns sunny and warm for the first time in the New Year, and the luxury of first one day, leads then to the deeds undone upon the second.  It is then that Frodo finds the rising bulbs, hidden beneath winter's mask, and notes the first color on the forsythia.

The old rake seems aware of its task, and performs seemingly independent of the untested shoulders.  Soon the tarpaulin is piled high with that which covered all the Earth, and Frodo strains with the long pull to the hillside below.  Fiona and Mick, the Wonder Dog, frolic for a moment, then realize that scattering more leaves is not a playtime agenda.  They need wait a while before joining the Hobbit on an excursion to inspect the activity in like-minded corners of the Shire.  For it is true that, despite all that is to be done, these first warm days are mostly occupied by uncovering what lies below, and an inspection of the possibilities.

The full moon that builds upon the day is dubbed "a raccoon moon," for reasons that Frodo knows not.  He has always suspicioned that it is an anniversary of the first sighting of a woodland creature.  It is one mystery easily solved he supposes, but Frodo is content with merely knowing that it is.  That which brings life back, and lessens the challenge of survival is something to be celebrated, not analyzed.  Soon the tasks at hand will be so voluminous that Frodo will bypass nearly all of his opportunities to free-lance, and maintenance will be his assignment.  Only the heat of the day will then bring him to pause and note that the detritus now warms a birthing salon, for coats of many colors.

May Frodo, and you, dear reader, enjoy your raccoon moon.  It will be a long time coming, again.  Look up and share the night sky with all those who thought enough about the world in which we live that they could help us chronicle this great gift.  

Posted by loveysdaddyga at 8:09 PM EST
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Saturday, February 7, 2009
You Know It Don't Come Easy
Mood:  on fire
Topic: "Kudlow's Kreeps"(4)

Frodo is a capitalist.  Henry Ford, Andrew Carnegie, Steven Jobs may or may not be nice guys, but they each, individually, assumed the majority of the fiscal and the emotional risk in order to create and grow business opportunities for themselves, and for countless millions around the small blue planet.  Frodo recognizes that some succeed in spite of themselves, and others fall prey to simple bad luck.  What they have in common is that they tried, they worked hard, they worried, and they reaped from that which they had sown.  Frodo will never decry the wealth and accoutrements that accompany hard-won success, despite his empathy for those who fall along the sidelines.  For those who inherit wealth, Frodo has no interest, and he hopes that they are taxed at maximum rates.

Frodo is also, as discussed many times before, a behavioral scientist.  He recognizes that simple causal relationships cannot necessarily scientifically define human behavior.  It is, impossible, in Frodo's way of thinking to say, for example, that "if you give a person enough money, he will spend half of it, and save the rest."  There are simply too many "unknowns" to apply either history or predictive polling to test such an assumption.

The internecine struggle in the United States Senate over the President's Stimulus proposals has provided Frodo with input regarding the strengths of capitalism as well as the folly of human behavior.  Larry Kudlow, of CNBC, has been the object of some interest by Frodo, and after listening to parts of his show last night, Frodo is as mad as a hornet, and is prepared to tell that pompous derelict exactly why.

First off, Kudlow has never met a suit "off the rack."  He appears as if everything from his perfectly-knotted tie to his color-conscious shirt has been applied to his torso as if it were Saran Wrap.  Physically, absent the tonsorial applications, he could be a homeless guy on Peachtree Street.  There is absolutely nothing attractive about him, except the outer wrappings.  He is shrill, and he interrupts.  He makes Chris Matthews look attentive.

Last evening, Kudlow had a bevy of fiscal market experts at hand, nameless to be sure, discussing the impact of spending one's way out of a recession.  Among those receiving queries from the grand poobah of Brooks Brothers was some chickee with long brown, straight hair.  The hair was so long that it offered the possibility of toilet application in an emergency.  Kudlow was wandering off on a tangent, but he asked the chickee to whom a CEO owed his loyalty first, to his share-holders, or to his country?

Frodo could not believe the Ann Coulter-type response, i.e. "to his shareholders."

But what really pissed Frodo off was the fact that Kudlow absolutely imitated "de Tar Baby."  He say nuttin'.

Mr. Kudlow, how many CEO's are there in Arlington Cemetery?  Would it be proper for a CEO to request a deferment from military service in order to oversee an acquisition?  Are there any committments that truly take precedence over your country's call?  Do you really believe that Jeff Immelt owes a greater allegiance to those of us who own GE stock, than to his country?  

Mr. Kudlow, your extremely bad judgment; your tolerance of an  uninformed and irrational response by a nameless chickee with no mind whatsoever puts you on a special pedestal in the Frodo Hall of Fame.

Larry Kudlow, you are an Orc, but well-dressed, adds Frodo.

Posted by loveysdaddyga at 10:38 AM EST
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Wednesday, February 4, 2009
Don't Hang Up, No, No, Oh Don't You Do It Now
Mood:  chatty
Topic: "Yella Rose a Taxes"(4)

Frodo, in all seriousness, has little patience with scofflaws, and that is particularly so when it comes to the issue of taxation.  Frodo is, however, not of such an ideological mindset as are those whose entire political philosophy hinges on their personal tax liabilities.  Frodos' life experiences have included some unique exposure to the process of taxation, and he is one who truly believes that "Taxes are the price we pay for liberty."  His opinions and his knowledge are much better than most.

Frodo knows that every candidate for national political office, and every consequential national political appointee is screened for conformance with the tax laws of the United States.  The IRS receives a "Type X" request, which carries a mandatory 3-day response, for every potential candidate or nominee, resulting in certification of "fact-of-filing."  Within the process, the subject "taxpayer" suffers a review of returns to identify any questionable inclusions or exclusions.  At this point, information is shared with the appropriate State and/or Local tax authorities so that complete compliance is assured.  If there is indication of something which may be problematical, the appropriate notifications are made and the nomination may be terminated.  Additionally, a more comprehensive review may be ordered should substantial noncompliance be uncovered.

An example of how such information is used can be found as it relates to Eleanor Holmes Norton (D-District of Columbia).   According to information published in the WASHINGTON POST and other media, when first selected to serve as the non-voting Member of Congress, Mrs. Norton was found to have not filed District of Columbia Income Tax Returns for 12 years, consecutively.  Mrs. Norton and her spouse each claimed that they thought the other had taken the appropriate action.  The Nortons filed the delinquent returns, paid all applicable penalties and interest, and then filed for divorce.  Mrs. Norton remains as the District of Columbia's Member of Congress.  Mr. Norton has been lost to history.

Had it been up to Frodo, Eleanor Holmes Norton would never have served a single day as a Member of Congress.  The argument that two attorneys, which is what the Nortons both were by profession, would be unaware of their joint failure to file income tax returns flies beyond credibility, especially when it continued for 12 consecutive years.  She should have shared a cell, at least, with Martha Stewart.

Tom Daschle served in the Legislative branch, representing South Dakota, for approximately 30 years.  At some point in time, his rank elevated him to to allow certain additional benefits.  To wit, he gets a bigger office, he is allotted more funds for his staff, and so on.  Included in these increased benefits is the service of a government-owned motor car, and a driver.  Said benefits are not included as "income" to Mr. "public employee" Daschle under the Internal Revenue Code.

Not too terribly long ago, Mr. Daschle was defeated in a re-election bid by John Methune (R-SD).  As the law permits, the "civilian" Tom Daschle received several lucrative private industry employment opportunities.  One of the benefits he received from his new employer was, you guessed it, a motor car, and a driver.   Incredibly, the value of such service is treated as "income" to a "civilian" under the Internal Revenue Code.  The failure by Mr. Daschle to include the benefit as "income" in three consecutive tax returns became the crux of the need for him to belly up more than $140K in additional taxes, penalties, and interest.

Frodo does not look to offer excuses for anyone.  However, it could be argued that Mr. Daschle, if he prepared his own return, may simply have either been unaware of the taxability of something he'd had for years, as non-taxable, or he forgot about including it after so many years of not having to do so.  If Mr. Daschle, and this is certainly most likely, had someone else prepare his return, it is entirely conceivable that he failed to include the information about the car and driver to his tax preparer.

Frodo notes that it took quite a while for this information to come to the fore, which would indicate that the IRS discovered the problem only after going into Mr. Daschle's returns in depth.

The true point of this discussion lies in the complexity of the Internal Revenue Code.  Frodo does not endorse flat, fair, or national sales taxes of any size, shape, or proportion.  He does recognize however that what we have is a process that can end up causing any one of us significant embarrassment.  And if you are wondering what Frodo would have done had he the power to do so, he would have suggested to Mr. Daschle that he withdraw his name from nomination.  And he would have felt like shit for so doing.


Posted by loveysdaddyga at 9:19 PM EST
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Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Tramps Like Us, Baby We Were Born to Run
Mood:  accident prone
Topic: "No Googling Allowed"(4)

"Mr. President?"

"Yes, Special Advisor for Pre-Employment Vetting, Mr.  Frodo, what do you need?"

"I screwed up, Sir."

"In what way?"

"Sir, I was absolutely convinced that the former Democratic Leader of the United States Senate, a man with a thirty-year track record in public life, was an absolute 'slam-dunk' as our Secretary of Health & Human Services nominee.  I let you down.  I let the country down by not pursuing tax issues to the Nth degree.  I should have. . ."

"Mr. Frodo, we don't have time to look back and lament our mistakes.  We need to learn from them, to go on, and not to repeat them.  That includes you, as well as me."

"Thank you, Sir.  Do you have any thoughts for me as we begin considering other candidates?"

"Well, in the spirit of cooperation, why don't we continue to look across the aisle?  Bob Gates is terrific for the Defense Department, so why don't we look to the Secretary of Health & Human Services, at least on an interim basis, from the Bush 43 White House?"

"Okay.  Sir, I can't seem to recall who that was?"

"That's funny, neither can I?"

The President hits his Blackberry and texts Vice President Biden, "Joe, who was HHS Secretary under Bush?"

A courier brings a hand-written message to the President, "Mr. President, the guy's name escapes me.  It was a guy, wasn't it?"

"Oh this is ridiculous.  Somebody has to know. Can't we just GOOGLE something like 'Bush HHS Secretary'?"

"The computer system has crashed again, Mr. President."


"Mr. President, can't we just call the former President at his ranch?"

"What time is it?"

"Oh right, it's after 10, he's in bed for sure."

"Do ya think Laura would know?"


"Where's Cheney?"

"Still at an undisclosed location we believe, Mr. President."

"Frodo, do you think Merry or Eowyn might know?  How about Annelle or Papamoka?  Sam?  Sam would know.  Sam knows everything."

"Mr. President, if any one of them knew, they have done everything since then in their power to forget."

"This is unbelievable.  Gone less than a month, and nobody can remember the name of a Cabinet Secretary responsible for everything from Social Security to Food Stamps."

"Uh, Mr. President?"


"Food Stamps come under the Department of Agriculture."

"Is that right?"

"Just don't ask me to name him, either?" 


Posted by loveysdaddyga at 8:05 PM EST
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Saturday, January 31, 2009
Litlle Girl He's Never Dreaming Of You
Mood:  bright
Topic: "The Real Rhett" (4)

Funny it is, thinks Frodo, how one thing sometimes leads to another.  Many moons ago, while watching an original telecast of the series "MASH," Frodo noted that all of the contingent in the 4077th was gathered together to watch an old movie, in black-and-white, called "My Darling Clementine."  The showing was interrupted time-and-again by the serious tasks at hand in the comedic series.  Frodo not only laughed, but he wondered about this, as one of those old movies that he had never seen.

You know how it is, dear reader, we all have some book that we have heard about all our lives, but never read.  We all have at least one movie we have never seen, and are almost ashamed to admit it.  To Frodo, Wyatt Earp had always been Hugh O'Brian "strong, courageous, and bold," and to entertain any pretender, even Henry Fonda, was almost a sacrilege.  Tonight, Frodo had an opportunity to right a wrong, and he took advantage of it.

Some time ago, while traveling with the Men of Gondor, Frodo had the good fortune to visit the house of one named Margaret Mitchell, the author of what is commonly regarded as the greatest American novel.  The docent informed Frodo that most scholars speculate that it was the real Doc Holliday of the Wyatt Earp sagas who was the inspiration for the character Rhett Butler.  Because Ms. Mitchell died, tragically, in a motorcar accident before truly divulging all of the facts, this has remained a speculative item in American literary circles.

In "My Darling Clementine," produced not long after "Gone With the Wind" was first aired, the character of Rhett Butler was portrayed by Victor Mature.  Clark Gable, of course, was the quintessential rogue from Charleston in the most famous of all American movies.  Frodo was struck by the similarity between the portrayals of Rhett Butler by Gable and Mature.  Not having seen "Clementine" before, because of his arrogance, Frodo was unaware of the mystery which both men brought to bear in the portrayal of Captain Butler.  Some good, Frodo supposes, can be said to come out of the Korean War, and Frodo's interest therein.

The movie may indeed be the best of the old westerns that did not include John Wayne.  There are sweeping panoramas, in black-and-white of course, and camera pull-backs which portend a disappearance of time and episode.  Despite the title, the musical score was almost in absentia however, leaving Frodo almost palatal as he swooned lest he be carried away in silence. 

Time well-spent, and now it is on to a book, which he will find in the library, unread, and perhaps it will divulge the secret of how Mr. Caulfield dealt with the issue of farting in church.  Once again, Frodo already had a character in mind, and did not feel it necessary to detract from his own self-image.  Be thankful dear reader, that Frodo selected the leadership of Lord Tolkien in these adventures, lest he close each presentation not giving a damn. 


Posted by loveysdaddyga at 10:41 PM EST
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Thursday, January 29, 2009
Bring Me a Higher Love
Mood:  crushed out
Topic: "Say It Ain't So,Jo"(4)

Travel, to Frodo, is not only broadening, it is scintillating.  Witness his tale of his love affair with a land that knows its true beginnings.   It started on Frodo's very first jaunt across the waters, when his flight-time for a trans-Atlantic trek was a cumulative 17 hours, interrupted only by a single stop in Keflavik, Iceland.

The stewardesses, and there were quite a number of them, were stunning.  Unfortunately, Frodo couldn't tell one from another, since they were all blonde, shapely, and melted his hormones with piercing blue eyes.  Did Frodo mention that they were all shapely, and blonde?  Frodo didn't speak much Icelandic, but he was more than prepared to try a form of sign language.  There were lots of smiles, no takers, in that group.  "Alas," thought young Frodo, "the imagination supercedes reality, once again."

The two-hour lay-over in Keflavik was a great disappointment.  The barren landscape was exceeded only by the drab and lifeless airport waiting area.  Looking forward to a semester abroad, young Frodo promptly decided that Iceland did not match his needs, and that, most assuredly, would be satisfactorily dealt with by the more sophisticated charmers on the Continent itself.  He thought little more of Icelandic sagas.

Many years later, Sam had occasion to pass through Iceland, and returned to tell Frodo that much had changed.  Frodo reasonably concluded that Sam was lacking in "savoir faire," and had been taken in by the solitary aspects of a foreign land.  Sam, however, refused to concede, and insisted that on their next trip abroad, the travelers would spend a few days in Iceland.  Frodo did his best to plan an itinerary, but was limited to a few geysers, the supposed entrance in "The Journey to the Center of the Earth," and the Church where Ronald Reagan and Mikhail Gorbachev met and discussed international relations.


The new and improved airport was full of young people, all of whom were blonde, and drinking, heavily.  Frodo noted the presence of all the stewardesses he remembered from his previous sojourn, so many years before.  None had aged a day, and Frodo saw one that he recognized almost everywhere.  It was as if Frodo and Sam had ventured into a yuppie paradise, with attractive, and apparently prosperous young socialites everywhere.

The uppermost of their few days on Iceland included a visit to the Rift Valley which separates the tectonic plates between Europe and North America, and a night-time bathing in the "Blue Lagoon."  Frodo learned that the entire nation is powered by the geothermal processes of super-heated water drawn from the earth's core, circulated through pipes, and returned again to repeat the cycle.  The Blue Lagoon is the end point, where temperatures reach the low 90's all the time, amid the volcanic minerals present in the soil which make this the world's pre-eminent spa.  Since it was October, Frodo and Sam were barely able to see each other through the fog,  but the "Northern Lights" shone overhead as if presented for their personal enjoyment.

Frodo also learned that the Icelanders have the greatest genetic-tracking model in the world.  It seems almost everyone can trace their ancestry back until at least the eleventh century AD.  Many readers, familiar with the name Leif Ericsson, may not know that the last name is a direct reference to Leif's Old Man, named Eric.  Nearly everyone in the entire nation has either "son" or "dottir" (Frodo assumes that an explanation for this syllable is not necessary) as an ending in their name.

More time has passed, and change has again come to Iceland.  Frodo and Sam have noted, with sincere alarm, the tragic impact of the worldwide economic collapse on the tiny nation that invested so heavily in "collateralized mortgage-backed securities."  The government has fallen, and the struggling Icelanders have accomplished something unique in their quest for a restorative future.  They elected an openly gay female prime minister.

To satisfy those currently wondering why Frodo has gone to such great lengths to describe this history-making event, readers should note a few facts about Johanna Sigurdardottir.  She is 66 years old, and is a former flight attendant for Icelandic Airways.

Did Frodo mention that she was shapely, and blonde? 


Posted by loveysdaddyga at 9:20 PM EST
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Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Look To Your Soul Now, And Open Your Mind
Mood:  down
Topic: "Liberal Lament" (40)

During the recent millennium, which in reality only lasted eight years, Frodo grew very weary of the assertions that it was the responsibility of government to defend the people, as if government carried no other function at all.  Frodo often averred that it was the responsibility of government to make sure that no American froze to death, or starved, in the dark.  Frodo believed that this was truly something with which all Americans agreed, but that only liberals could put into words.  Many Republicans, it seems, get very righteous, if not downright indignant, when forced to support a fellow countryman in any situation which cannot be otherwise classified as purely gratuitous.  The concept of welfare is cast upon their souls, and they retch.

Mr. Marvin E. Schur, of Bay City, Michigan, froze to death inside his home earlier this week.  Mr. Schur, a widower, had no children, and he was, until yesterday, 93 years old.  Mr. Schur, it seems, owed Bay City Electric Light & Power more than $1,000 in unpaid bills.  The Bay City Manager, Robert Belleman, said that a city utility worker had installed a "limiter" device to restrict the use of electricity at Mr. Schur's residence.  Such a device, it seems, blows out, like a fuse, if "consumption" rises above a certain level.  There is no indication that anyone explained the device, or how it operated, to Mr. Schur.

Remember, for the love of Pete, we're talking about Michigan, in January.

A neighbor discovered Mr. Schur's body on Monday.  Beside the body were each of the delinquent notices; paper-clipped to each was cash sufficient enough to satisfy each and every notice.  Mr. Schur had voluntarily surrendered his drivers license several years ago.  His telephone, designed for those with normal hearing, was useless.

Robert Belleman, in response to a reporter's question, said that the city policies would be reviewed, but he did not feel that the city had done anything wrong.  "I've said this before and some of my colleagues have said this:  Neighbors need to keep an eye on neighbors," said Belleman.

Born during the First World War, Marvin Schur survived that War, and several more.  He lived through the greatest Depression, and he saw man land on the moon.  He was, unfortunately, not able to survive the installation of a "limiter."  Timely payment did him in.  Poor, silly, old man.

Mr. Belleman, respectfully, you suck!



Posted by loveysdaddyga at 10:00 PM EST
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Saturday, January 24, 2009
Walk On Through The Rain, And You'll Never Walk Alone
Mood:  hug me
Topic: "Friend by your Side" (4)

Weekends in the Shire are often filled by ritual.  In modern times, that has included a game of soccer, followed by a game of tennis ball and, shortly thereafter, a walkabout.  Mick, the Wonder Dog, and Fiona ("the most beautiful girl in the world") participate with ageless Frodo, if, indeed, participate is the proper word.  There is an anxiety in brown-eyed creatures in early morn, and an expectation of ritual observance despite the clime.  That is why a Hobbit and two canine companions played in the rain this day.

Frodo knows that days such as these, despite the inconvenience of mud and wet, are to be savored.  There is gray about the muzzle of Mick, the Wonder Dog, and Princess Fiona limps noticeably, a fact which even a strong heart cannot hide.  In days past it was Lucky, Snooze, Sig, Prissy, Lovey, Gumbo, and Georgia who alternately led, then followed, the Hobbit on his merry rounds.  Rocky and Punkin,' the feline predecessors to Beau Neau McKitty, and both Peeper and Sydney from the airways, have been significant contributors to adventure and heartbreak.  A "family reunion" is an event that will occur only when Frodo eventually enters the proper gate, and tosses tennis balls from every cloud.

Frodo and Sam have often discussed the existence of a "puppy angel,"  omnipresent, when needed.  The existence of which was something that Frodo mentioned in conversation in recent days.  A friend, who recently lost employment, told Frodo that the most difficult of adjustments is that which comes with having nothing to do at 6:00 AM.  Frodo immediately interjected that a daily duty of his in the subject time period is the approximate correlation of urination and the first entry by the Wonder Dog into the gardens of the Shire.  His friend laughed, then began to consider the deeper meaning of Frodo's comments.

Frodo and companions will soon pursue the walkabout for this day.  Despite his protestations to the contrary, Frodo knows that Mick, the Wonder Dog, will take note of every fresh pile of poop deposited within the distance of a leash for the next hour or so.  Fiona will observe Mick, the Wonder Dog's inattention at such moments, and will bark an alarm in order to elicit a feverish response.  Mick, the Wonder Dog, never seems to catch on, for it is his sworn duty to ever defend his smaller friend, and he reacts thusly.  The annoyances are part of the joy, and that is one of the reasons why the contingent seems to enjoy their time together.  At least that is what smiles and long tongues tell Frodo.

Mick, the Wonder Dog, is a working dog by definition.  One such as he requires physical activity each and every day, and to do less is cruel.  Frodo knew that going in, and he has never regretted one second of the commitment.  The activity is good for Frodo, and never leaves him with idle time on his hands, for Mick, the Wonder Dog, does not compute a maximum amount of activity, then call it a day.  He is always ready to go.

Frodo cannot help but think about what comes next.  Sasha and Melia are all agog over their first puppy, while Sam has been rather outspoken in the avoidance of the future demands that an untrained producer of waste products requires.  Frodo knows only that he will always need someone to talk to who is as impressed with his musings as well as with his blather.  Such a companion is, indeed, a wonder. 

All things considered, it is another good day in the Shire.        

Posted by loveysdaddyga at 12:08 PM EST
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Wednesday, January 21, 2009
At Last
Mood:  special
Topic: "Bettah than Etta"(4)

Listening to Etta James sing "At Last" puts the taste of branded whiskey on Frodo's lips.  Passersby to his motorcar must look askance as he rocks gently to the sensual interlude he enjoys with this virtual serenade on his radio.  It is one of those moments which change his entire mood, and which ease all of his troubles.  For something less than four minutes, he feels a feminine caress over his brow, and both body heat and curling smoke rings are recast.  Maybe not his favorite recording, but certainly very high on the list.

Last evening, as he considered the fact that soon his entries will carry the designation (5) and beyond, Frodo realized that the words before you, dear reader, are the first not inspired by the rule of Sauron.  Watching the replacement enter to the presence of adoring participants at the "Neighbors Ball," he was stirred by the champagne presence of a gowned beauty who caught the magic of Etta James.  The rendition of "At Last," dedicated to President Barack Obama by Beyonce, while Obama shuffled alongside the graceful Michelle, will live with Frodo for the rest of his days.  It was a stirring audio and visual decoupage which can only be compared to sugar plum fairies and Russian composers.  This is an extremely gifted, much less inspired, artist.  For that fact, Frodo will excuse her forays into exposed hip-hop and the bump-and-grind of canine behavior.  

It is fitting that Frodo begin the post-Sauron adventure with reference to that which is the art of his time.  The music we make, dear reader, lets us paint pictures which befit any gallery, and the young lady who surpassed perfection with her performance last evening is a masterpiece.     

Posted by loveysdaddyga at 8:57 PM EST
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Monday, January 19, 2009
Let's Get Together And Feel All Right
Mood:  party time!
Topic: "Free Hidden Telecast"(4)

Not unlike much of America, Frodo was all geared up to watch the free concert at the Lincoln Memorial yesterday afternoon.  Bruce Springsteen still has greater appeal for the Hobbit than does Donovan McNabb or Larry Fitzgerald, so it is not hard to imagine his disappointment when the announcers on MSNBC informed him that the rights to the concert had been "sold," and that they would not be allowed to broadcast the performances.  Masking his disappointment with a little bit of ingenuity, since no one was willing to say to whom the broadcast rights had been "sold," he started pushing the remote.  Eventually, he found that HBO was simulcasting the rights they had purchased to each of the cable or satellite channels, and that Frodo therefore had access to the performances on his Direct TV 101 channel.  He did not think, until later, how disappointed so many others would be because they did not have such access.

The concert performances, interspersed with a speech by both the PEBO and the VPEJB, and selected readings by performers who, like Frodo, cannot carry a tune, were spectacular.  Only Elvis Presley, Rod Stewart, and the Rolling Stones in Concert have moved the Hobbit in ways that even compare to what was presented yesterday.  Garth Brooks created a moment which will live forever when he engaged tens of thousands in "Shout," and even "no Drama Obama" clapped and sang with a song made famous by his fellow Chicagoans, the Blues Brothers.  It was Beyonce who closed the world with her all-join-in rendition of "My Country 'Tis of Thee," that made Frodo remember that Martin Luther King, in that very spot, spake the same words in his "I Have a Dream" speech.  Once again, the orchestration of history and hope had been brought together in truly professional perspective.

Ah but, dear reader, nothing prepared the Hobbit for the "Boss" bringing 89-year-old Pete Seeger with him on stage.  Together they engaged the world with all six verses of "This Land Is Your Land," and even Fiona and Mick, the Wonder Dog, danced and sang with Frodo and Sam.  Recall that it was Seeger who introduced "We Shall Overcome," to Dr. King, and taught him the words to the hymn of the civil rights movement itself.  Seeger, the workers' friend, tried as a Communist in the days of McCarthy (the evil one), proved, once again, that patriots do come in all shapes and sizes.

Joy was all about until Frodo realized that the "free" concert would not be "free" for lots of people, and he was sorely disappointed.  It is something that needs to be shared.  Frodo knows that things like this cost lots of money, even when performers do so gratis.  It just doesn't seem right that it is always those with the least of means who miss the show.  HBO, he is sure, will broadcast the performances for many days, and, eventually, "sell" their rights to a broadcast network.  Admittedly, it will not be the same as the spoantaneity of the moment.  Warm up your popcorn poppers though dear reader, for Frodo will alert you when it does appear on the black-and-white, and remember to prepare for the conversion to digital from analog.  Failing that, even Frodo will have no clue.



Posted by loveysdaddyga at 3:57 PM EST
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