Topic: "Media is the Message(2)"
Press Secretary Number Three has now reported for duty. Crack National News Reporter Frodo Baggins, seated to the left of Helen Thomas, waves his hand above all others by standing on his chair.
"Mr. Frodo," your hand is highest, so you will have the first question."
"Thank you Mr. Snow-Job. Can you tell us what your Father is doing today, and what his position is on an Excess Profits Tax for Big Oil Companies?"
"Yes, Secretary of the Treasury Mr. Snow-Job. He is your father, isn't he?"
"No that is not correct. We are unrelated."
"You mean that it is sheer happenstance that we not only have two Bushes, but we have two Snow-Jobs in the same Administration?"
"No, Boy you are confused, there is only one Bush, but there are, indeed, two Snow-Jobs, er I mean Snows."
"Now just a darn minute, you mean to tell me that there is only one Bush in the White House?"
"No, what I'm saying is that Former President Bush, who is the father of the current President, is not a member of the current Administration."
"Well duh, what I'm referring to is Laura, whom I believe goes by the moniker 'First Lady'."
"Mr. Frodo, what is your point? Everyone knows that, as the President's wife, Mrs. Bush carries a support role to the President."
"His wife? Well what about Condi calling George her husband? How many wives does Mr. Bush have?"
"I assume that the comment to which you are referring, which took place several months before I came to this office, was merely a slip of the tongue."
"A slip of the tongue? Is that anything like referring to the 'thousands of mistakes' made by the Administration in the implementation of the Pre-emptive War?"
"Well, I believe that Secretary of State Rice clarified that remark to reflect it as a characterization of the imperfection of any human endeavor."
"Characterization? Well, exactly how many mistakes has the Administration made in the implementation of this War?"
"That, Mr. Frodo, is what Secretary of State Rice said would be determined by historians."
"Now that reminds me," said Mr. Snow-Job, "I am today announcing that all further news items will be issued directly to the Faux News Network in order to gave a 'fair and balanced' presentation of the facts. Members of the Press should contact Mr. O'Reilly or Mr. Hannity for the appropriate briefing."
"What? Well, what are you going to be doing, and what happens here?," queried Frodo.
"Excellent question, from now on these briefings will be known as the Historical Perspectives. You all are invited, but be advised that there will be a test after each sesssion, and that a failing grade on more than two daily tests will result in the de-listing of your credentials. We call this 'No Journalist Left Behind.'"
"Mr. Snow-Job, exactly whose idea was this, if I may ask?"
"You may ask."
"Well, whose idea was it?"
"Secretary of State Rice felt that a historical perspective would be of great value to the White House Press Corps."
"Well what did the President have to say?"
"He said 'Yes Dear.'"