Topic: "Sexiest Man Alive"(5)
It was probably a rainy Sunday, and Frodo settled down to watch something mindless on his black-and-white. The movie had something to do with a country nightclub with an extremely violent clientele, and the "bouncer" who was hired to maintain order. Frodo has been in a few bars in his time, and has never been particularly supportive of the role played by the bouncer, so it was his predisposition to root for the bad guys. Frodo grew increasingly uninterested as sophomoric violence spread like oleomargarine over the characters, that is until the potential for a little hero-heroine peekaboo lovemaking caused him to shift positions in his Lazy Boy.
The heroine peered through a window, looking to the shoreline of an idyllic lake, taking note of the hero, in the gleaming of the Morning Sun. Clad for dance, he turned his head in the same direction as his thrusting arm. then he spun and danced in the opposite direction, and threw his trailing leg into a high kick landing on the toes of both feet. He paused. He whistled both arms in a rhythmic flurry of circles, then stretched to his full height, and held the pose, arms aloft, as if he were Nureyev, waiting for Fonteyn to enter upon the stage. Then he moved both hands toward his torso, as if he were holding something, round, in both hands. There he stood, for five minutes or longer, as if he had a great prize between his empty hands.
With a leap and a kick in finale, he ended his exercise, turned to the window, and smiled to his assumingly unseen audience of one.
In the early mornings at Lake Lovey, Frodo will leash Fiona and Mick, the Wonder Dog, and walk them out across the earthen dam. Once an acceptable location is reached, he unleashes his friends and lets them wander about until they individually settle in the underbrush and perform their duty. While they sniff and explore the fresh scents of morning, Frodo lifts his arms high above his head stretching toward the Sun, until his wrists touch, then he spins and kicks, landing on the other leg. He holds the pose and slowly balances, like a crane, with one leg level with the Earth, and both arms aloft as if he were about to fly. He steps back onto both legs, then reverses the pose just completed upon the other leg, again as if were about to soar above valleys far below. To finish, he takes hold of an invisible balloon, and holds it against his torso, tightly enough to avoid escape, but not tight enough to burst. When five minutes pass, he leaps and spins his hips in the air, landing softly a full half-turn, facing the mildly interested canines.
The little old ladies who walk around Lake Lovey in the early mornings don't know what to make of the Hobbit doing something called Tai Chi'. Frodo is convinced that they time their walks in order to see if today will be the morning when he breaks his neck. For Frodo, as he leashes up his associates and heads for home, he remains grateful for the artistic inspiration of "Roadhouse," and its hero, Patrick Swayze.